I have recently become TERRIFIED of tornados. We are under a tornado watch right now (Not a warning... A watch) and I'm too scared to sleep.
I've never been scared of tornados, and I've been through 3. The first one, I slept through the entire thing. I was 5 or 6. My dad carried me down to the basement and I slept on top the the freezer through the storm. The second one, I actually ran out INTO the storm. I was 8 or 9. My dog was outside in the barn. I was young and stupid and wanted my dog to be safe. I managed to slip out of my dad's arms, ran outside (When the tornado (That had touched down at this point) could be seen in the distance), got my dog out of the barn, and brought her inside. My parents were NOT happy! I'm just lucky my dog (Who usually hated being in the house) humoured me and followed me inside without a fight. The third one was the same summer as the second one. All I remember is that the wind was so strong that it blew our front door off (And almost took our farmhand (Who had been looking out the door at the time) with it). And I have been through PLENTY of tornado warnings... The "we need to get to the basement NOW, but nothing ever touched down near us" type of thing. I've never been scared of them.
Then last year my fiance (who was "just" my boyfriend back then), son, and I were at my fiance's cabin. One second it was beautiful out (We were actually getting ready to go swimming in the lake), the next second it was POURING out. I was holding Oliver (Who was 8 or 9 months at the time) and walked over to the big window in the living room in disbelief. My fiance mentioned something about the sky looking weird, and then there was a HUGE gust of wind. It literally shook the cabin (Which really isn't a cabin, it's more of like a three story three bedroom two bathroom house on a lake that their family calls a cabin). My fiance grabbed my hand and pulled me and Oliver down to the basement. After a few minutes, he had to go back upstairs because we didn't bring flashlights or Oliver's bottle... And guess who was hungry and is scared of the dark? He came back down and told me that there was a tree through the window that Oliver and I had been standing at.
Ever since then, I've been scared of tornados. Right now, it's about 2:15am. We are under a tornado watch until 3am. I've tried going to bed several times since now since midnight but I'm too nervous to sleep. I don't think I'll be able to until we are out of the watch. And then Oliver will be up at 9:30 or 10... Yay! :(
Ugh, what is wrong with me? Why am I so suddenly scared of tornadoes?!
You lived through it. You know what can happen, and now you are a parent. I was fearless in the B.C. era (before children). Life and death suddenly matter infinitely more when you have children to protect and live for. Reality hits.
If the "PTSD" / fear you are exhibiting is too much, you can go to a therapist trained in "EMDR." That may help you be more "normal" about this.
"Why am I so suddenly scared of tornadoes?!" Because now you have a child to protect.
You grew up and actually had an encounter with danger. You now know just how serious they can be.
It is often during the young adult years when one suddenly understands the danger that previously they didn't internalize. Meaning, sometimes a younger adult just doesn't realize that "they" can get caught in the storm. That they could die during a storm or some other natural disaster.
So, in other words, you grew up and become an adult and now understand just how scary a storm can be and that you must always take precautions to be safe.
You had a real close call with the tree in the window, and since you now have "Mom" genes and sense kicking in too, you need to protect your son and family, and you can't do that if you are asleep. It's normal and not something to be super scared of. How would you know if it changed from a watch to warning if you were alseep? who would get you in the storm cellar?
I don't know that you are being unreasonable, I have never been through one, but when the watches happen here in Oregon, we pay attention the whole time because we truly have no idea what they are going to do. Mountains affect them oddly I guess.
Anyway, are you really scared and terrified, or are you being extremely cautious about your familie's well being? I personally wouldn't go chase one! It's only 15 more minutes, and then the stress should be over and you can relax and go to sleep knowing your family is safe. Good night, Mama.
I think when we become parents we develop deeper fears....and that's tied into the responsibility of another human.
I think O. thing that might help is to be prepared, have a plan, supplies, etc. ready. That might help with the feeling of being at the mercy of nature. Knowledge is power.
Here's O. place to start:
http://www.bt.cdc.gov/disasters/tornadoes/
There's nothing "wrong" with you, and it's not a "sudden" fear. It's a completely reasonable fear. You came up close and personal more than once in your life but it became REAL when it became your own child that could have been injured or killed. You had your parents protecting you before but now you're the protector. It's a sobering thought. And as another mom said, you can't sleep when these things happen because if you sleep then you can't know what's happening in order to protect your children.
I live in CT where we get all sorts of weather including tornadoes and hurricanes and Nor'Easters and severely damaging lightning storms and... well, you name it. We even get the occasional earthquake. The anxiety just from the weather would be crippling if I didn't have children to model my behavior for (because I have anxiety disorder).
I think you have good reason to be frightened, but if you're prepared you have no reason to worry so much.
Do you have a NOAA weather radio? They turn on and warn you to seek shelter when needed. I have one and it's such a relief!
I also have a "storm room." It has food, water, blankets, lights, etc. already in it.
Finally, if you're really worried, it might be time to finish the basement and have a room down there so you can sleep soundly on stormy nights!
Being prepared is what has helped me to beat the anxiety.
As others said, you're scared because you now KNOW the damage a tornado can cause, and you have the responsibility of raising a child. I remember one time several years when I was driving along a curving road in the rain and skidded a little. Instead of thinking "I could be hurt", I thought "I can't die, I have two kids to raise." I definitely wasn't anywhere near dying (not even hitting something) and my kids have a very devoted daddy, however that's where my brain went. If developing a storm plan will help you feel less anxious, then do it (and it probably is a good idea). Good luck with getting through the anxiety!
You can't help it. something happens when we have kids. Things I was never afraid of before I'm all nervous worried and scared. Our protection mode goes into action to keep the kids safe and the overflow goes toour lives. Also we want to be around for them so we need to stay alive.
you're not really asking, are you? i mean, it's really quite clear why you're 'suddenly' afraid of tornadoes. people who don't learn from personal experience are pretty stupid.
i'm guessing your question is more about 'how do i cope with this new fear?'
to which i would say, preparation. have a safe place to go, and practice the drill with your family as often as you need to. it's good to have a routine well-learned enough so that everyone hits auto-pilot when a crisis comes.
arm yourself with knowledge. learn all you can about tornadoes, their frequency, their patterns, the statistics.
it's good to have a healthy respect for unstoppable forces of nature. but not to live in a constant state of fear. usually knowledge and preparedness will help.
khairete
S.
Now that you have a child, you are worried for your child's safety as well as your own life.
You do not want to leave your child without his mother.
This is very normal. You now have an understanding of how your own parents felt, and I bet you now realize how much danger you were in all of those times.
You need to come to peace in your heart and mind about all of this. An accident could happen at any moment to any of us. We have to do our best to make god choices, but we cannot let the "what if's?" take over our lives.
If this worry, fear begins to hinder your normal activity, please speak with your doctor. As women our hormones go wacko sometimes, the chemicals in our brains can also become unbalanced as we mature and go through pregnancies. We must stay aware, so we can be mentally healthy, to be he best we can be.
It is a pretty reasonable thing to be scared of.
I'd be scared too!
I'm sure you arent the only mom that is going to be extra tired today.... I'm sure most in your area were too nervous to sleep.
Grab a nap when ya can.
Consider moving away from tornado land?
You just told us why.
Can you relocate to a part of the country that doesn't get tornados? That's what I would do if I were you.
I doubt that you're going to get over this fear unless you go to a therapist. Even then, you still might not get over it.
Hope you got through the night okay, and that the watch turned into nothing.
Good luck,
Dawn
You look VERY young in your picture. I would say 19, maybe 20. So you had your son VERY young.
What is causing your anxiety? Being unprepared. You have a child to protect.
Contact an agency like the American Red Cross or The CDC and find out what you have to do to be prepared. You usually get plenty of notice for tornadoes, right? The weather center usually sends out messages or breaks into programs to announce severe weather.
People with knowledge and maturity tend not to get anxiety if they are prepared. Get prepared. If your anxiety level does not drop after you are prepared, you may need to seek the help of a professional.
i litterally have panic attacks when it storms, i freak out! i used to love storms and bad weather never scared me. now that i have kids im scared... kids change everything lol
Oh my goodness nothing is wrong with you! You are now realizing what you went through as a child and seeing the panic that your family went though. You now fully understood what could have happened from a parent's perspective. You have a child to protect and are realizing that you don't want him to have the same experiences you did. Nothing wrong with that at all. I would get a small space set up in the basement that is comfortable, probably with a mattress or sleeping bag and a pack and play. This way even if there is just a watch you could comfortably sleep there. You can have your emergency essentials kept in a bin in that area and hopefully sleep or atleast be at peace knowing you are doing what is right for your family. Good luck!
I don't blame you for being scared...only after being through so many, why don't you just move!
your ok,,,i grew up in calif.saw some of the worst electrical storms and suffered thru several earthquakes-im terrified of both-when they talk severe storms and the lightening is all bad..im on the floor -no kidding-i think as we get older-we understand the full impact of mother nature.as kids in calif.we use to sit in the windows an watch the sidewalks roll up n down and split open-in total awe..now scares the hell out of me.we just understand the sudden impact now..deep breathes-relax yourself-stay aware-best you can do.;)
I remember the ride home from the hospital with my 1st baby. I was suddenlt terrified of crazy drivers. It seemed like people were aiming thier cars for us! It was nerve wracking. I suddenly developed all sorts of new fears when I became a parent. I don't think that means anythings wrong with you. When fears turn to anxietys, that's when it's a problem. If your fear is affecting the way you live your life, it's time to talk to somebody. I would find it pretty hard to lay my head down and sleep if I thought a tornado was developing overhead. That's normal. If I made decisions in my life to not to go outside on a sunny day for fear of tornadoes, that would be not so normal!
Maybe just buy some Valerian or get some sleepy tea. Try taking melatonin to go to sleep gently. If it causes you anxious feelings, heat racing, hyper ventilating, ask your dr for xanax.
