Help - Alexandria, KY

Updated on September 28, 2007
L.M. asks from Alexandria, KY
9 answers

I can't get my 2 year old (in June she was 2) daughter to lose the binki. When i drop her off at my sister-in-laws house each morning (I work full time) she leaves it in the car because she knows that her aunt will not allow her to have one. However, at night I can not get her to fall asleep with out a huge production and temper tantrums that wake the dead. I am just too exhausted to fight anymore that I give in and give her the binki so that I can get a good night sleep. I need some advice!!!

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P.B.

answers from Dayton on

I would probably let her have it for now - but require her to only use it sitting in her bed. That way she still has some control. I did that with my now 22 year old DD. They are not to interested to sit in there bed that much.

We got rid of it then by letting use it to pay for a new toy she wanted. It was some doll that she wanted, so we let her pay the cashier for it with her pacifier. So that night, when she asked for it, we could tell her that we did not have it, that she had given it to the cashier for her new doll. She was old enough to understand that concept and had to accept the fact that it was gone. Done deal!

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J.D.

answers from Columbus on

You might just have to live thru a few days (maybe weeks) of tantrums. You could try saying that the binki was lost, I've heard of paople making up some story about a binki fairy; however, I have always believed that honesty is the best policy, just tell her that she is too old, it isn't good for her teeth, etc., she is old enough to reason and understand. Right now all she is learning is that a big enough fit (no matter what the reason) will get her what she wants, which, I am sure, is not what you want her to learn.

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S.F.

answers from Columbus on

I saw this once on suppernanny and not sure how it worked but here's the idea...they told the little girl there was a binki fairy, so they tok a ribbon and tied te binki to a tree outside at bedtime,she would take it and give it to someone else would need it. Later that night they snuck out took the binki off the tree and left a prize for it in return. If she has more then one you may want t try it one at time to see how it goes the first time. If you have luck...then do it with the others. I hope that this helps some..I got lucky and didn't have to worry about breaking this habit. Lots of luck to you

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M.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi my name is M., i kind of disagree with the whole taking a binki away. I mean you don't want them to walk around out with them all day. But i think at night at 2 it is ok. My boy just had his a night and when he got into his big boy bed about 2-1/2 he just all the sudden did not think about it. I know i got lucky with that. But i think they will drop them when ready. My friend also just gives her almost 3 year old at night his binki. She tells him if he wants it he has to go to bed. Which most kids don't so they say no. Also, my therapist for my child gave me chew toys for occupational therapy. Some time it is a transition period for them. I know society and dr say get rid of binkis but children will in there own good time. Just might be different then other children. And you cannot be exausted and be a good mommy.

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D.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi Leanne
All my children took a binki except one and he sucked his thumb. They all gave them up before 5 yrs of age, including the thumb sucker. This is a tool they use to relax or calm themselves down. I once was told that it is better to let them have a binki, then psychological problems later. I had to learn to pick my battles and that one was easier on the both of us to let go. She will not go to school with it,I promise.
D.

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J.L.

answers from Dayton on

Don't give in. Make her feel like a "big girl" and throw a party one weekend of "throwing away the binki". My older two never took the binki, but my newborn is, and it scares me that I am giong to go through the same thing. You don't even have to throw them away, just "act" like you guys are, and then take her out for ice cream or something afterward. When nighttime hits - offer something else that soothes, read a book, sing a song, do a dance together. Make her forget about the binki and make her feel like a big girl that she got rid of them.

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R.J.

answers from Columbus on

Hi Leanne! I have been there! My daughter Maddy was a binki baby. I kept testing the waters to see if I could get her to bed without a binki and one night while we were rocking, I caught her interest -- she was about 2 1/2, and it was almost Easter. We had just visited the Easter Bunny at Polaris, and I told her if she left her binki for the Easter Bunny, he would leave her a special toy that she really, really wanted. So we did this, and she put her binki in the Easter basket and went to bed without it. She got her toy on Easter day, and all seemed well. She was proud to tell all the family about it. NOW - she did ask for a couple of nights after Easter where her binki was, but we held strong and told her the Easter bunny gave it to another baby that was just born and really needed one. She bought it! I would say she asked periodically for a couple of weeks, but we stayed the course, and finally she got the picture that "binkis are for babies." Good luck! What ever you decide to do, just be consistant, and do it when you feel it's the right time. Only you will know when that time will be. There is no magic age I'm afriad...

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K.Y.

answers from Cincinnati on

I read in a magazine (i think) about a mom that had her son 'buy' a toy from the store with his binki. He picked it out and she told him that it would cost him 1 binki (insert amount based on home many binkis yours has). This seemed to be a very creative and useful idea. Might give it a try. Good luck

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K.J.

answers from Dayton on

I would let her have it for now and then wait a couple weeks and try again. Maybe offer her a reward by letting her trade it for something special (maybe something for "big girls" since she doesn't need her pacifer anymore) and then get rid of all of them so that when she has a tantrum you can just say you wish you could let her have one but they are all gone. When we got rid of my daughter's I made sure there weren't any left in the house so I wouldn't be tempted to break down and give her one. It was only really bad the first night and then she did ask for it a couple times after that but we survived. She has a Dora doll that she sleeps with now. Maybe try to offer her something else to comfort her when she goes to bed - a doll, stuffed animal, blanket, etc. Good luck!

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