Seeking Opinions of Finding Out the Sex of My Baby

Hi! I waited for my first 2 and found out on my last. And as a mom of 3 boys...I thought it was way better to wait! It was the best suprise and I felt like I worked harder in the delivery just so I can find out. Getting to see them is great! Good luck either way and congrates!

A.,
I didnt find out what any of my kids were when I was pregnant. It is very exciting to have the doctor say its a ....... With my last child I had 3 boys and I really felt like it was another boy. And when my daughter was born and he said its a girl it was awesome. Its a lot different than in an ultrasound room. I hope this helps.

S.

lol my non chalant thinking is you get what you get, and you can't change that if you find out at 20 weeks or wait until the end-right? My pregnancies were highly monitored so was hard for me to say no when they asked if I wanted to know- If for no other reason it helps with the planning and clothes and things- AND a big plus for me was not stressing over girl names that we just couldn't agree on :)

Hello! I waited until both of my children to learn what they were. It was exciting to me for people to guess if my baby was a boy or a girl. Everyone guessed that I was having a boy with my first, but they were all wrong. With my second I guessed that it was a boy just because the preganancy was different from my first, and I was right. I figured that you can't change the sex of the baby so does it really matter what you are having. I would just be happy with having a second child. To me the birth of the baby and finding out the sex was the greatest rush. I love them both so much that it didn't matter what God gave me as long as they were born healthy. Best of luck in what ever you decide.

I think it's up to every parent if they find out the sex or not, but I have read, and my experience has been, that my children have had an easier time adjusting to a new sibling when they've known to expect a baby sister or brother and to start hearing the baby's name and references to him/her prior to their birth.

Just a thought since you already have a child. Congratulations and best wishes for a healthy pregnancy!

I did not find out the sex for either of my children. It was a lot of fun for friends and family as well as myself and my husband to guess what we were having. For me it was one of the best decisions I've ever made. And also it was not to bad for my son to adjust to a baby brother/sister. He had just turned 3 when my daughter was born. We read books and asked him if he wanted a brother or sister. And talked to him about the things he could do with a baby brother/sister. For us we just wanted a healthy baby. Good luck with your decision.

We found out accidently w/ our DS. We weren't sure so we had the tech put the sex in an envelope for us to open later. Well I was showing the pictures around and an ultrasound tech friend didn't hear me say we didn't know the sex yet. And quite loudly she said "There it is". Well that was set. Then for our DD we still weren't sure. We were going to do the envelope thing again (hubby wanted to know I didn't). And she wasn't in position so that we could tell. We decided not to try and move her just take it as a sign. It was a nice surprise. I don't wish that we had found out. DH got to call the sex and he was quite emontional when he first realized he had a daughter. This is one of the few true surprises you may get in your life. There will always be people buying you sex appropriate clothes, so don't worry about that.

the drs knew for both mine but i threatened them with their lives if they told me. i just couldnt think of what would get me through that last month and hard labor if not for getting a suprise at the end LOL.

its neither right or wrong either way. i know technology is so good now days but just 15 yrs ago i had a neighbor who 3x... yes 3x named her baby girl she was carrying only to have a boy pop out all 3x's. soo...

I have a son who just turned two and we knew right away we did not want to find out the sex. I don't regret it for a minute. I had to have a c-section and they put a mirror up right when he was ready to come out and my husband and I were so excited to see if it was a boy or girl. There is no feeling in the world to compare for that anticipation. I truly think for baby #2 (whenever that day may be) we will do the same thing.

we had a surprise with our first and absolutely loved it. our second we found out but i think if we have another we would keep it a surprise:)

We didn't find out the sex of baby #1 and thats the way i wanted it to be. BUT my husband on the other had wanted to know the sex, so in order for me to have my surprise I had to promise to find out the sex with baby #2 ( in the future). I loved the excitement in the OR during the birth of my baby GIRL! WIth my second pregnancy we found out the sex because of the promise i had made. I was actually excited to know, plus it was a boy so we knew we had to get all new clothes, plus they were born opposite times of the year too.

Hi A.,
Congratulations on your second baby. I have 3 kids and never found out the sex of any of them. It always kept the excitement alive. I said it was what got me through labor...wanting to know if it was a boy or a girl. I guess I always felt like I would be happy with either one so it was fun to wait and see. I would recommend waiting, but that might be more difficult since you found out with your first one. Either way, enjoy your pregnancy and your new bundle of joy when he or she arrives.
God Bless,
G.

I waited with my son and was so glad that I did, there are only a few suprises in life, it was hard not knowing but we were very glad we waited.

heres the question I want to see answered by you - what gender do YOU think your baby is!?? 70% or so of moms instinctivly KNOW what the gender is! :D if not - the babyzone predictor thing worked for me! it takes your age at conception... and shows gender expected. if that goes along with what you feel the gender is - you have a high chance of being right.

AND if that feeling you have about gender needs to be verified, do it. if not, dont.
nothing is 100% and there have been plenty of people who have had the gender told to them who have gotten a whole room ready for a girl, only to find it was a boy! LOL and vice versa!

i felt from the moment i found out i was pregnant that it was a boy. we called it "he" from the beginning. which made a couple people mad cuz they didnt want to know! LOL. but we were right! :D so... yeah.
good luck! and congrats!

You could have the technician write it in a sealed envelope. If you decide you can't wait to know you can still find out.

I never wanted to know the sex of my children and I LOVED the surprise after a long hard labor! However, when my sisters were pregnant I thought I would go crazy not knowing! :)

I didn't find out the sex of either of my children before they were born. It was harder with the 2nd one -- as I wanted to plan ahead. But, I never regretted not knowing! I have a girl and a boy, and I think it was even more special to call our family and say "it's a girl/boy" --- the anticipation was fun for everyone! I think you won't regret either decision!

Hello,
I have a 4 1/2 year old girl and 2 1/2 year old boy, and we did not know the sex of our 2nd child. And had fun comparing the heartbeats and playing the "games" of "What do you think we will have?" with our friends and family.
Also I think as a mom, and the Intuition we get, it's kinda fun to see if you get "that feeling" of "I think it's a ????"
I didn't have that feeling with our 2nd one until about the 7th to 8th month, but then I was convinced it was a boy, and due to the recorded heartbeats at the appts. my husband was convinced it was another girl. In fact when he was born, my husband said to the doctor.."It's a girl right?" And the doctor turned him over, with a smile on his face, said.."Ugh, No."
So whether you find out or not, there is always the surprise of what your child will look like anyway. May God bless you and your family in this exciting time.

I have two two babies my son is 2 and i did find out his sex because i wanted to buy the right clothes and bedding etc.. for my first. but with my second i did not find out because i figard that if i have a boy i have everything i need and if i have a girl i will have to but somethings but all the little thing she could use like blankets, storller, swing, some clothes etc.. I with now i had a little girl who is 1 and im glad i didnt find out, like you said it is one of those only true surprises in life. hope this helps

I have two wonderful little boys. Neither my husband nor I wanted to find out the sex of either children. I admit I wanted to find out a little bit with the second, but I am so glad we didn't. I think it is so much more fun. Everyone in my family waits with ears pressed up on the door and my husband and I can't wait for the doctor to say, "It's a ____!" I really can't express to you the look on my husband's face when he threw open the hospital door to yell, "IT'S A BOY!!" There is no greater surprise. I know people always say it's easier and blah, blah, blah.....but my children NEVER went without clothes or anything and their nurseries were adorable. People always buy you gifts when the baby is born anyway. We never had set names either. We had one we liked for our first and when he came out we didn't think he fit the name so we ended up changing the name when he was born. You can plan everything in life and it never seems that exciting. Not knowing the sex and name of your soon to be child is so fun and exciting. I don't regret not finding out at all. And if we have more children, I don't plan on finding out with those either!! Good luck with your decision and remember it is your decision. Blessings!

I did not find out with my first, I'm due in 4 weeks with my second and didn't find out this time either. I think it was a great decision and one of the best surprises I've ever experienced in my entire life- I can't wait for the upcoming surprise! I highly recommend waiting- but do what is right for you.

We did not find out and it was very exciting. My husband was the strong one. If it were totally up to me, I probably would have found out the sex at the ultrasound. But, it was such a miracle to wait and be surprised.

I loved not knowing!! We had some fertility issues, so this really was the only surprise we had left :) I will never forget the look on my husband's face when Dr. held up that squirming little baby and said "Congratulations - it's a boy!"

It did, however, drive our family & friends CRAZY to not know. They didn't know how to shop :) (apparently they forget that babies need more than cute little clothes). We were hopeful that we would have more than one child, so all the baby stuff we registered for was gender neutral (car seats, strollers, etc). Our nursery room was pretty neutral (baby farm animals) and it could have been boy'd or girl'd up afterwards.

I am pregnant with #2 and can find out gender next week ... I'm really debating this time. I think it would be fun to know ... but we'll know the birth date ahead of time (repeat c-section), and I'm not sure if I want to take all the mystery away.

Good luck, whatever you decide - it's an amazing moment either way!!

I'm sure you'll get a lot of responses on this subject - because everybody has an opinion. I found out the sex with both my kids ahead of time, and I was glad I did. I had a boy and the 2nd time I had a girl, and it was nice to be able to get some pink girlie things before she was born, because obviously I didn't have any. It was fun! But of course you could always do that after the baby is born. It's a personal preference. Good luck to you!

A. i have had 3 children, all of which i did not find out the sex of, and in the age of that technology too, i chose not to find out, it does make for better surprises and im glad i did not find out, my first child was a boy which i really wanted, then of course you want a girl, well i did anyway, im glad i chose not to find out i was carrying also a boy, it was h*** o* me to find out it was a boy, none the less i loved him and i would not trade him for the world, but my deep need for a girl, caused some depression afterward, but it was ok, i got over and enjoyed my boy, however today i look back and think that if i had known it was a boy in the womb, i would of had that depression while carrying him, and that surely would of affected his personality, how the mothers disposition during pregnancy can affect a child, severe depression in women with child studies have shown it does affect the child, so i am sooooo happy i did not find out, i love my son and who he is today and how well and happy he is and adjusted, i went on to have a third child, which i also did not know the sex of, at his birth i was like its gotta be a boy, i just know it, and he came out, a boy and i was just as happy , the three of them today are wonderful and i would not trade knowing for anything,im so glad i did not find out what it is, today people want to be prepared, and buy the stuff right away for it, but you can buy sleepers and blankets and you get more needs right away than clothes, so its not a big deal, we tend to paint the rooms before the child comes, and later too when they grow up, so it dont matter, just enjoy carrying a life and enjoy it, we took both clothes to hospital, a pink outfit and a blue one to bring them home in, also boy and girl names with us, it was fun thinking of names for both too, well any way its been grand not knowing, D. s modern mom of 3 wonderful boys, !!!

A.,
I have 2 girls, age 5 and 7, and did not find out with either of them. We wanted to with the first, but the sonographer could not tell. We were disappointed at the time, but joyful at the moment of her birth. I was pretty out of it while in the delivery room (after 36 hours of back labor), so I don't remember having as much excitement as I had anticipated.

With #2, since we didn't find out with the first, we opted not to with the second. It was a much different (way easier) delivery and it was a wonderful surprise when she was born.

Good luck with your decision!
K.

I did not find out the sex of my oldest child. I was surprised to find out he was a boy.

I did learn the sex of my youngest child. I was surprised to find out he was a boy.

I guess I wish I would have *not* found out with the second one. It was more exciting and fun the first time to wonder and guess and was something fun to talk about. I liked the fact that I could plan more with the second - clothing, his room, etc... - but there was something missing from the rest of the pregnancy because I knew what he was.

::shrug:: Prolly just me, but if I had it to do again, I would not find out. I'd wait and be surprised.

Hi, my husband and I waited until our daughter was born. We would wait again if given the opportunity, it was amazing!

I didn't find out for either of my kids. I think not knowing made me look forward to the birth even more. Turns out I had girls both times and was ecstatic! My 2nd was a scheduled c-section so I already knew her birthdate. I wanted something to be a surprise. Whatever you decide, I'm sure you'll be happy with the outcome which will be a beatiful baby.

Either way is good, but my thought is that it was always a surprise, whether it was at 20 weeks or when you deliver. My fist child (daughter) we did not know prior to the delivery. We wanted to, but she was in a bad position during the ultra sound and they could not tell. For my second child (son), we were able to tell during the ultrasound and it was just as exciting as the first time. The only bonus the second time around was that it gave us plenty of time to get the "boy" stuff we were lacking due to the first child being a girl.

Go with what feels best for you and you won't regret it!

I would definitely wait. Like you said, it is one of the only truly real surprises in life. My husband and I chose not to find out the sex our first (and so far, only) baby. It was exciting anticipating which it would be up until the very moment HE was born. If you've already done it the "find out early" way, then try it the "wait to find out" way this time around. You'll be glad for the extra source of anticipation and excitement once you're in the throes of labor, as well!

I would definitely wait until for the surprise!!! It was amazing. I will admit I almost changed my mind at the ultrasound because it was so tempting. However, once the ultrasound was over, we never regretted not finding out. It is one of the true surprises in life and I think it made everything more fun (picking out names, decors, etc). The only thing I didn't like was that we got too much green and yellow and once our son got here I wanted BLUE! :)

If you truly don't care what gender it is, I would suggest letting it be a surprise. I found out with my first baby, and was glad I did because we both really wanted a girl badly and we got very lucky! :) My middle one was a surprise, and I found out again with the last. It's always nice to have one surprise, but because I had Csections and had a difficult recovery, I really wanted to know with my last one so I could be more prepared.

I found out the sex of both my boys beforehand...probably more for financial reasons than any other. So, I guess if you don't need to know in order to budget for new clothes, etc, and you don't mind a lot of green and yellow, then wait. I didn't tell their dad, though, so it was still a surprise for him both times. It was fun to share the surprise with him and yet be prepared as well. :)

We waited to find out with our second, and I have to tell you, it was the best moment of my life (besides when my son was born, of course :) ) It's one of those moments you really can't describe or prepare for until you go through it. I highly recommend it!

We found out with my first but only my husband found out with our second. That was a bad mistake but that's another story.

I would highly recommend that you don't find out but it's your decision:) Would you regret finding out? I know I started off not wanting to know with our second and then I said I wanted to know but when it came down to it I wanted to be able to feel both sides of knowing and not knowing. It is so exciting waiting for the doctors to tell you. It's really a joy. I didn't experience such a feeling with my first because I already knew.

My kids are 25 months apart so the older sister had no issues adjusting. I don't think it matters whether it's a boy or girl when it comes time to prepare an older sibling. A baby is a baby and the sex doesn't matter in my opinion.

List the pro and con reasons for finding out or not finding out. I didn't have that option when I was pregnant. The reason I like that you can know is that you can plan a room, buy the clothes and prepare everything for that sex instead of getting everything in yellows and greens. It also makes it nice knowing if there is going to be a shower before the baby is born. I also agree that it takes out the surprise at childbirth most of the time. I have heard of people being told it was a girl to end up having a boy in the end. In any case, I knew by intution what I was having each time. I just sit down and closed my eyes and pictured what I was holding at birth. I wasn't ever wrong with all three of them and the last one I had an on going arguement with the doctor on it. He swore the heartbeat was too fast and I was having a girl... I said it is a boy. I did have a boy. I also knew that my granddaughter was a girl even when her parents were sure they were having a boy...lol so maybe it is only me ;-)

Hi,
I did not find out the sex of our baby (a boy), and I loved not knowing! It was so much fun to hear everyone's opinions, (i.e., carrying high, heartbeat rate, etc. etc) about if I was carrying a boy/girl. It made the process of labor/delivery even more special knowing that I was finally about to meet this little person and that it would be true surprise to find out the sex. Not finding out the sex is one of the last, true surprises left in life :)

I have four - and each one was a surprise since I chose not to find out. I preferred that way because it allowed me to bond with each unborn baby as a person regardless of sex. It was wonderful to finally meet each little person - delayed gratification in these times of instant answers is kind of nice.
I thought my first was a girl - it was a boy. I had thought I wanted a girl, but when presented with the precious little boy I could not have imagined anything better and I was delighted. If I knew ahead of time, maybe I would have felt disappointed and maybe he would have felt that?

I didn't allow myself to hope either way for the second, and when that one was born it didn't even matter. I actually held that one for a few minutes before thinking to look - it was a girl!

The only disadvantage is buying clothes etc ahead of time, but its fun to do so afterward as well.

We waited with both of our kids, and I am so glad we did. There was nothing better than hearing "Its a boy" or "Its a girl"

We did NOT find out with either of our daughters--it gave us something "unknown" (but "risk-free") to look forward to and kept everyone else guessing until the end. The only way we would have found out was if there had been twins in there (there was only one). I like the surprise. We now have 2 girls. IF we have a 3rd baby, we will not find out b/c the 2 girls would share the bigger room and baby # 3 would have the nursery whether it's a girl or a boy.

We have two children (Girl 6, Boy 4)and we didn't find out with either. I am very happy we waited. With the first one, my husband said it saved us a ton of money as I would have been out buying everything pink under the sun!

Plus when you know everyone wants to know your name and we weren't willing to share that is it just invites everyone's opinion about the name - when they don't find out the name until they see the baby, the focus is the baby and not the name.

To me the moment of "It's a Girl or It's a boy) can't ever be replaced. Now you may argue you have that same feeling at the ultrasound but for me it was the end of the pregnancy journey. Kind of the I DID IT moment - which I know is corny. I think pregnancy and birth is awe inspiring so to me it is the fitting end to reveal the surprise then.

Good Luck - whatever you decide is right for you.

You already have so many responses but I couldn't resist telling you our story!

We kept both pregnancies a surpise. It was fun. After the ultrasound of our first daughter we went through a phase of kicking ourselves for not finding out. Its so exciting its hard to wait but, it is so worth it!! The doctor told us with our first what she was, I was in shock! I thought for sure she was a boy.
With our second, I kind of wanted to find out at the ultrasound but my husband talked me out of it (I was secretly hoping for another girl, it was hard to think about waiting) When in labor I made sure the doctors knew that WE wanted to find out ourselves what we had. They laid her on my tummy after she came out and we lifted her little legs to see what she was and I yelled ''It's a GIRL!!!!'' I was so surpised because again, I thought for sure I was having a boy! The moment was perfect and so special, I can't imagine it being as memorable and special if we would have found out at the ultrasound.

With all that being said...I would WAIT!!!! :) You will NOT regret it!

We didn't find out the sex of our little boy until the day he was born. What a surprise! I think of it this way - at Christmas, what fun is it to know you have a toy doll if you can't play with it until you open the present? Good luck!

Go with your gut. :)

But if you want a practial reason, here's why we chose to find out. With #1, we didn't, and like you said, loved the surprise. We had gender-neutral gear and clothes, and were happy with our decision. Once our son was born, he was showered with "boy" gifts and clothes. When we got pregnant with #2, I wanted to know if it was worth hauling all that boy stuff out. If we had a girl, I felt like I would have wasted time washing and sorting boy clothes. And if we waited to do all that, but had a boy, I didn't want to be doing all that work with a newborn. Just something to consider.

I found out the sex of my baby after having several ultrasounds so I can't actually answer your question. However, I just wanted to let you know that you could ask the technician to write down the sex of the baby and then you can peek at a later date if you like or you can throw it away or let dad look at the paper, etc.

I felt the same way and someone told me that it is always a surprise, whether at an ultrasound or at the birth.

A.-

We have two children a boy and a girl and we did not find out the sex of either child. You are right, this is one of the things in life that you can allow to be a suprise and boy was it a suprise both times. I totally thought I was having a boy the second time around because my pregnancies were both the same, but I was wrong. We had a girl and I am so happy that we didn't find out. I always thought I wanted two boys and that if I found out I was having a girl, it would not make the rest of my pregnancy "fun". Now that she is here, she is one of the best things that happened to me, however, if I would have found out, I don't know how I would have reacted. I know you say it doesn't matter to you either way, but in my case I am so glad we didn't find out. It was so much fun calling all of our friends and family to let them know we had a girl, instead of calling them and saying-she's here. It truly is a personal choice, but I truly was blessed to not know what I was having either time and I am a planner. Sometimes, life shouldn't always be scripted. Good luck with your decision.

Hello A.. I had three kids and did not want to know the sex of any of them. I thought the birth was so much more exciting not knowing. But be aware.... When we had the first child, the ultrasound was horrible. By the time we had the third child the ultrasounds had improved so much better that we could tell we were getting a boy. If you dont want to know, I recomend you dont look at the pictures too closely. : O )

As a mother of four, I found out the sex of the baby only one time. I have to admit, I would recommend the surprise element everytime to those that ask. I always explain it like this, when you find out what it is before hand it is like knowing what your Christmas present is under the tree. You still want it and are very excited, but it does not have the same excitement attached to it on Christmas Morning. I had three girls and then a boy.

I found out what I was having on my 3rd one. My fourth was a surprise to us anyway and I knew it was going to be my last. I will never forget how shocked I was when the doctor said you have a boy. I looked at my husband and said, "are you sure - we don't make boys". You have to decide what is right for you. I like surprises.

I read thru several responses and most seem to lean toward not finding out because it was such a delightful surprise. So, I just had to give another side in case you are really leaning that way...

I found out with both my kids (they are both boys and honestly, at the ultrasound, it was hard not to tell!). And when people chastised me by saying, "Why would you want to ruin the surprise?" My answer was either: 1.) It is a surpise whether I find out now or 4 months from now. 2.) Life is chock full of surprises. In fact, I could do with a few less surprises on most days.

Wait for the birth, as I speak from experience from 20 years ago, when knowing the sex of your child was a wait and see adventure. It is always an exciting time being pregnant and waiting to find out if you are going to be blessed with a boy or a girl is one of the best gifts that you have to wait for the results. I have known several ladies that thought that they were going to have one sex and thought they would get a jump on the decorating/clothes and had the nursery and clothes all ready for the opposite sex and low and behold they ended up with a darling little boy who had a lovely collection of pink clothes and slept in a lovely pink nursery. So wait and go neutral and be surprised.
Best of luck and happy pregnancy to you and your family.

I too am pregnant with my second child. I found out the sex of my first child, but choose not to find out the sex of this baby. I know that this will be my last child and my only chance to have that surprise.

I wanted it to be like the "old" days when the husband comes out and announces it to the world.

Good luck on your decision. Whatever you decide will suit you best :)

I wanted to know with each of my three kids, but only found out for my oldest two. My husband pointed out with our third that we had one of each and whether we knew the sex or not, we were going to love this baby just the same, even if we couldn't call him/her by their name during the pregnancy. I begged and begged and begged him to let me find out, but I think he knew I wanted to wait to find out as much as he did. :) I'm glad we waited, because it was such a joy to be surprised when she was born (I was dead set that she was a boy. Oops) :P When my midwife smiled and said "you have a little girl!" I was thrilled to tears. :)

I'd say if you want to wait, do so. Do what's right for you. It's such an exhilarating feeling to finally find out, regardless when you do so! :) Congrats on Baby #2!

I found out with my first and did not with my second. I think it made the pregnancy so much more fun not to know. It was hard (I am the kid who couldnt wait til Christmas to open my presents). I loved hearing peoples opinions on what they thought it was. I was more surprised when my daughter was born (i was one of the ones thinking it was a boy) Plus it is great not getting 14,000 pink or blue items. If you are excited now, think of how exciting it will be when the baby is born. Congrats to you!

You have to wait. I waited for my son and I plan to wait when I decide to have another one. You know that you joy will be so big when the baby comes out, why not multiply that by also getting the surprise of what the sex is. Believe me it at least triples the joy.

We have four children and didn't find out the sex ahead of time for any of them. I loved knowing that we'd be surprised!! I was positive that we were having a boy for our first child. When the doctor told us it was a girl, I was in awe. My husband laughs b/c after the doctor said it was a girl, I asked him if he was teasing. :)

Maybe part of my reason for not knowing the sex of the baby was selfish. My husband and I also didn't share names ahead of time. We might have narrowed it down, but never chose a definite name. We always said that we needed to look at our baby. I felt like this added a lot to the surprise element. Grandparents, aunts/uncles, friends, etc. were so happy to get the call and find out if we had a boy/girl.

My sister-in-law had her first baby a year before our first child. They knew the sex, named the baby and had a c-section so we all knew exactly what day this baby would be born. I think b/c I knew all of this so far in advance with their child, I decided I really wanted ours to be a surprise.

Not knowing with our fourth was the hardest. While I was having the ultrasound, the tech asked me if I wanted to know the sex of the baby. I kept looking at my husband wanting him to be the one to accidentally say, "sure" but he just told him that we loved the surprise. I was glad we waited, but at that moment, I think I could have easily been persuaded to change my mind.

The clothing really wasn't an issue for us. We had the basics and it gave me an excuse to go buy a couple pink/blue blankets. Also, we always received plenty of gifts that were very girly or boyish....depending on which child it was. Our major items...stroller, bedding, etc. were neutral b/c we planned to have several children and wanted to use them with both sexes.

If you want to wait, just make sure you decide before the ultrasound and that you and your husband agree. It's VERY difficult if they ask you during the ultrasound.

Congrats on on the new little blessing coming your way.

Hi A.,
I have never been as truly surprised and excited as I was at each of my son's births. I didn't find out what I was having either time- (although I strongly considered it)- and was SO thrilled to truly "not know". Waiting for the doctor to say, "It's a boy!" or "It's a girl!" was such a wonderful feeling of anticipation and excitement. It was such a joyful surprise each time and is even hard to put into words how special it was!! I never regretted "not knowing". I would do it the same way all over again. :-)
In a way too, it helped me mentally to push the baby out because I just couldn't wait any longer to see if I was having a boy or girl! :-)

Either way- I hope it is exciting and fun for you whenever you choose to find out! ;-)
Tami

I am 21 weeks pregnant and we had our ultrasound at 18 weeks. With our first one, I just HAD to know because I had to be prepared. But with our second one, we decided to wait to get that big "IT'S A XXXXX!" moment. I am more excited for that than disappointed about not finding out. My family, on the other hand, is on pins and needles to find out the sex. : )

If you are happy either way (boy or girl), and at least minimally prepared to handle either sex in the first few weeks, I say STAY STRONG! I know you said there wouldn't be, but if there would be any disappointment at having one over the other, you might want to find out early so you have time to accept it if it's not the sex you were secretly hoping to have.

You'll be happy with whatever you end up deciding, really. Good luck!

We did not find out the sex of our baby, and I wouldn't have had it any other way. I feel the womb is such a sacred, private place. The birth was such a joyous, momentous event, that was the culmination of 9 months of waiting. It wasn't an anticlimactic, "Oh, look, here's Madison Anne, finally."

I loved not knowing the sex of the baby. I felt like there was such a wonderful secret inside of me. I have a personal belief that, outside of medical necessity, we shouldn't be peeking inside the womb. I didn't even have the routine 20 week ultrasound. (I did have a very early ultrasound at 7 weeks, because I thought I miscarried. I had a very quick one at 36 weeks, because we thought the baby was breech. That ultrasound was maybe 30 seconds, tops.)

Also, we never told anyone our choice of names, so when our son was born, EVERYTHING was news to our friends and family.

We did get a lot of pushback from people we knew. They were upset because they didn't know if they should buy pink or blue clothes, and curiosity was killing everyone as far as the names went.

We waited with both of our children (2 girls), and it was so exciting to find out when they were born. It is difficult to wait, especially since most people seem to expect that and politely ask the gender, but it's worth it. I definitely recommend waiting, if you can.

A.,
I did not find out with my first (a boy) and I was glad I didn't. That being said, I think you're going to be just as excited either way! If you don't know, you'll be excited to find out. If you do know, you'll be excited to think about your little boy or girl when they come out! :) Still, it was super fun to guess, and fun to hear everyone's theories: since I was carrying way far out, it was a boy; since I was carrying up high, it was a girl, etc. The best part for me was driving all of my family and friends CRAZY (since they're all huge proponents of finding out the sex!) Whatever decision you make, you're going to be happy and excited either way. Heck, I'm excited for you already! Yay!
Best of luck to you,
Amy K

Hey A.! I am all about the surprise. A little back story is that my mom would always tell me what I was getting for Christmas/birthdays, ect... so there was not much suprise growing up (She was just too excited about what she found for me). So, when I got the chance to REALLY surprise myself I did! Twice. We thought for sure our first was a girl! We were shocked and overwhelmed when it was a boy. Our second I had a feeling it was a boy and it was boy. We have another on the way, and I have no idea this time around either! I am so excited for the doctors to pull it out and say those magical words to me!!! I would so try to talk you into not finding out! I'd give you a million bucks if I had it :) because that is what it feels like when you find out at the actual birth.

I didn't find out the gender of my first baby. Sometimes it was hard...sometimes I wanted to call the midwife and ask her to just tell me if the baby was a boy or girl! (The gender was in my file, because I had an amnio)

But most of the time it all felt very sweet. I loved carrying a baby and knowing it was just my baby. That's all. No boy, no girl. No names. Just "the bean" as I called it.

I was so surprised and happy when I gave birth to a girl! And, like you said, it's one of the only real surprises left to us anymore!

We chose to be surprised with our baby mostly because it didn't matter to us whether we had a boy or girl and because we'd heard of several people who did find out and then were surprised at the birth to find out the doctors had been wrong. We picked out names for a boy and names for a girl and we bought an outfit that was unisex for bringing baby home. We also painted the room a color that would work for either a boy or girl. We didn't do much pre-baby clothing shopping but you can certainly buy onesies and sleepers that would work for either. I'm very glad we waited to find out...it was a true surprise for us and you don't often get those these days.

To be honest with you, I don't understand how it could be more of a surprise when the baby is born than when you have the ultrasound. I just don't see the difference. I was floored with both of mine when I found out what we were having at the ultrasound. I thought my husband and I would only have boys and our first turned out to be a girl. Thought because we had a girl already that we would be having another girl and now it turns out that I'm expecting a boy. Surprised me both times. A surprise is a surprise and I don't believe finding out ahead of time diminishes it at all. It's just a personal preference. Some people like knowing so that they can call the baby by name before birth and prepare for having a boy or girl (there really aren't that many uni-sex outfits out there anymore). Others are fine with waiting and just calling baby "Cletus the Fetus" or whatever. It's all up to you and what you truly want to do.

I see you've had tons of advice but wanted to tell you my thoughts too.
With our first daughter we found out at the u/s and it was awesome, and thought I wouldn't have it any other way.
Fast forward 2 years later and we decided to keep #2's sex a surprise. Not knowing was hard but let me tell you, it was so worth the wait. I had an inkling #2 was a girl but there were days that I'd think boy, and it was a fun going back and forth and wondering what was in there. When #2 came out I was focused on gender and when I saw it was a girl I cried happy tears and the feeling was amazing. We loved not knowing so much that we kept #3 (our only son) a surprise too. Having experienced both ways I say WAIT. It's just an amazing feeling to anticipate for 9 months and then finally know at the end. Good luck!

A.,
I have had 3 kids and didn't find out the sex on any of them and I wouldn't change it for anything. Like you said, it is one of the true surprises in life. Yes, you are very excited right now, but just think of that anticipation when you are in the hospital pushing and waiting to see when the baby finally comes out and the doctor holds the baby up for you to see and says "it's a girl" or "it's a boy"....that truly is something you will remember FOREVER! And then the fun of calling people and saying, we had our baby and it's a girl or boy! It's very tempting when you are in your ultrasound to find out, but my suggestion is to wait! It's so much more in the moment when you find out after delivering! Trust me!

I realize you already have 72 responses... Here's one more :)

We found out as soon as we possibly could what the sex was of our baby. I had waited for more than 5 years before my husband agreed to try to conceive and another year to become pregnant. I was so excited to be having a baby I just couldn't wait to find out what it was!

I do not in the least regret finding out. it made it easier to shop ahead of time and decide on a nursery theme. If it had been a girl we would have gone pink or purple and pink. A(nd it makes it easier for people coming to your baby shower- especially those with a lower budget, since they know what color blanket or onesie to buy.)

either way, go with your gut instinct on whether you want to know or not. Just remember, once you know you can't go back to not knowing. But if you want to delay the surprise as long as you can stand it but want the option to know to stay open, have the ultrasound person write it on a paper and have him put it in a sealed envelope with only your last name on it. (If it was me I would ask that they put it in my medical file, so I at least have to wait until the next visit to get the answer!)

We did not find out the sex with either one of two girls and if I had another I would not find out again. With the first I was totally convinced she was a boy and was shocked when my husband whispered in my ear as she was born that we had a baby girl. I didn't have a "feeling" either way with the 2nd and was thrilled to have another girl. The labor and delivery nurses loved that we didn't know and we're just as excited to be surprised with us. I never had any regrets not knowing... I am a HUGE planner, but with my babies I was fine with just waiting and seeing :) It is such fun..

I found out with my first and was estatic it was a girl. #2 wouldn't cooperate so we didn't know until he was born that it was a boy. This made it hard to go shopping. We ended up having like 2 outfits for him and had to go shopping on our way home from the hospital to make sure he had something to wear.

#3 didn't cooperate on the 20 week ultrasound, but the u/s tech missed something so we had another one at 25 weeks and we did find out.

I will worn you tho that they can be wrong sometimes. My friend was told it was a girl during her ultrasound and ended up having a 12 pound boy!

We did not find out the sex of our 2 children at our 20 week ultrasound and we loved the anticipation! There is nothing better than working so hard during labor so that you can meet that little one and having absolutely no idea who or what it is adds to the excitement during labor.

Wait, wait, wait........you will be happy you did!

I loved finding out when my daughter was born. It was a truly magical moment, not only do you get your child but you get your daughter or son. I dont know if that makes sense but I thought it was great. I'm pregnant again and I could have found out at the ultrasound but both me and my husband really liked finding out when she was born that we decided to wait.
I still remember when they lifted her up and said it's a girl, I turned to my husband and said look it's your daughter! He said that he really liked that I said that to him, it made him feel instantaneously connected to her.

We didn't find out the sex for our first baby (a boy) who is now two. I'm due Thursday with our second baby, and we did not find out. It has been fun not knowing. I wouldn't change it. For people who get upset because they have to buy unisex clothes, etc. I thought they could wait until the baby is born to buy presents anyway. Newborns only need love, a few outfits, a bed, diapers, blankets, and breastmilk/formula in the beginning. Good luck!

If you can't decide before you go just bring an envelope and ask them to write it down and seal it up in the envelope and then if you decide you want to know you can open it. I think it is a surprise whether you find out at the ultrasound or after you give birth. Good luck!

It is a "true surprise" regardless of when you find out. It's just timing. Do you want the surprise now, or when you are giving birth?

I chose to find out before my birth. I wanted to name this little being inside of me and start the bonding process before they were born. I started talking to them by name while they were still inside of me! It was such a special time.

When they were born, we all sang Happy Birthday. I had outfits monogrammed ready for them to wear home. So sweet and personal!

Hi A.,
I didn't find out the sex of my first baby, my daughter and I'm so glad I didn't. It was so exciting to find out we had a girl in the delivery room, especially since I thought I was having a boy. I'm now 34 weeks pregnant and also did not find out the sex of this child. My husband and I think it is so exciting to find out the sex in the delivery room that we didn't want to ruin the surprise. I'm like you, it doesn't matter whether or not it is a boy or a girl so why not wait. Now we have the luxury of daydreaming what it will be like to have a boy or a girl. I agree that there are few enough surprises in life. My husband compares it to opening a Christmas present early and ruining the surprise.

Good luck with your decision A..

I have a 7 year old girl and a 4 month old boy. I didn't find out with either what I was having. I was single with my daughter and was very excited she was a girl. And it was fun picking out names for a boy and a girl. The greatest memory I think I'll ever have is with my son the doctor said "It's a boy!" and my husband threw his arms in the air and yelled "Woo-hoo!!" It was great - and well worth the wait. Eventhough all my friends were dying to know what it was! We also kept the names we had picked out a secret. Think about it - if you find out what you're having, and you tell people the names, what is left when it's born? The actual baby is a surprise, what it will look like, but people will already know the name and sex...I guess waiting to find out til delivery was a big deal to us. Good luck! And congratulations!!!

Oh my gosh, let me say not finding out was the best!! I didn't find out with either of my girls and I'm so happy I didn't. There is no greater feeling than to go through your labor and have that baby come out and to hear the words "it's a girl!" or boy, as your case may be! I absolutely loved it. Neither my husband or I wanted to find out. Another fun thing is when you make your phone calls to family and friends. People are really waiting for that call. Now I'm not knocking people who find out, but receiving a call when a baby is born when you already know the sex and the name isn't nearly as much fun as receiving a call when you know nothing! We didn't tell people the names we had picked out either, so everything was quite a surprise to people. Also, I know of 3 people who were told the sex of the baby only to find out it was wrong!! That's my biggest fear of finding out. One friend was told boy, decorated the room, bought clothes, had a name picked out, etc. and when he was born, he was a she!!! Imagine that mess! Anyway, whichever you chose will be fine, but I do think you should experience the big surprise at least once! Good luck!

With both of my pregnancies we wanted to find out the sex of the baby. With my first, they didn't have a good view (she was crossing her legs in such a manner that it was not visible on the ultrasound). With the second it was very visible and easy to see, even for the untrained eye (this was a boy). It was kind of fun not knowing the first time around. You get so many people who want to guess and give you reasons why they think it's a boy vs. a girl, and so on. But if you are on the fence about finding out... see what happens when you're there. Maybe tell them that you are not sure if you want to know now, but perhaps they could write it down and place it in an envelope. That way if you decide not to know... you don't have the surprise ruined for you. But down the road if you are too anxious to find out... just open the envelope. Good luck! Congrats on you new one!