Tryin to Teach 3 Year Old to Share

Does he have problems sharing at daycare? Talk to the teachers about it and ask what they are doing to correct behavior. I say this because the way to correct any type of behavior is consistency! I know all too well about the cousin thing and the sharing issue. I still have them with my 3 year old too! What I do when the cousins are together is reinforce the "take turn" rule, and even try to engage them in more activites where they can both do the same thing if sharing is a BIG problem. Like play-doh, for instance, or bike riding, so long as there are two bikes. =) Something else I do with the cousins, is tell them BOTH, that if they can't share, then X toy will get put away and NO ONE gets to play with it. I have ruffled some feathers of my nephew's mom, but you know what... too bad. I have to look out for my kid. =) Don't be afraid to step up and tell the cousin to take turns too. I know it's hard to teach your own though esp. when the other doesn't share. Hang in there. They eventually learn how to share.

Hello F.,
If I am understanding correctly, at your mother in laws house your son's cousin doesnt share his own toys with your son, but you tell your son to share his toys with his cousin?
I think if they each want to play with their own toys and dont want to share then that is ok. But if the toys are communal toys ie.. the mother in law provides them for all of the grandchildren to play with, then I would tell *both* children to take turns with the toys. But I am also a big believer in .. if someone is playing with something, then he playing with something! Alot of times I see situations where a child is happily playing with something, another child comes up and wants that particular toy, and so the mom of the one who was already playing with it says to that child "ok Johnny, we need to take turns, give the toy to Tommy". And my feelings are that no, Tommy can play with it if and when Johnny gets finished playing with it. There are other toys, choose one of them. Now if it is a swing at the playground, then obviously I feel differently.
And at the daycare all of the items are, I'm sure, communal, so sharing there does make sense.
hth and good luck!
A. -mom to Dominic (9) and Julian (6)

Unfortunately, you can't control what other people teach their children. The only one you should worry about is your son. Teach him to be the person you want him to be, regardless of how his cousin behaves.

Sharing is an important skill he should learn, especially if he goes to daycare. If he won't share in daycare, he's going to end up in timeout. Your son is too young to understand that he should share at daycare but not with his cousin. Just teach him what he needs to know and he will be fine.

Maybe you could supervise play between the boys and facilitate (sp) the sharing if your sister-in-law won't, saying things like "okay it's so-and-so's turn now so why don't you play with this?"

I think that you are doing a good job in trying to teach your child to share. But stay with it! Just because she isn't showing her child how to share, make sure that you continue to instill those good ethics into your child. It will benefit both of you in the future. When you go over to their house, just teach your son that even if the other child doesn't share, that he should still share and set an example for the other child.

Good luck!