Toddler and Infant Sharing a Bedroom

My now 4, 2 and soon to be newborn will share and we never have any problems. They do go to bed *better* they wake and play together (in the mornings), they just seem to be comforted by each other. With the new baby, we will keep it with us for a while (around 3 mos) with the other baby we just heard him when he cried, responded quickly and the toddler never woke.

Hi Lori. I would recommend keeping the new baby in a basanette in your room for the first month or two. You'll be up for feedings throughout the night anyway, and you don't have to risk jeopardizing your other child's sleep. once new baby sleeps through most of the night, then move her to the bedroom. At that point, I think you'll find it's not too big of problem. Kids sleep pretty heavily once they're used to the background noise. Its likely the older child will sleep right through any crying. They may bond more sharing a room as well, so overall I'd say its a good idea.

My 4 y.o. daughter and 2y.o son share a room and they love it. They each ask for the other one if they go to bed at different times. However, I kept my son in our room until he was about 18 months (in his crib) because I was so worried about them waking each other up, he is a terrible sleeper. I almost wish I would have just toughed it out and let them learn to sleep in the same room when he was an infant. They do occasionally wake each other up, and I won't lie, alot of nights he ends up in our bed because I just want her to get a good night's sleep. But honestly, it all works out and most of the time things are fine and they sleep together in their room. From what I've heard from others who did it when they were children, it made them and their siblings alot closer, and it seems to be true for us too! Good luck to you!

Hi Lori! Congrats on the new addition to your family. I have 2 daughters who are 17 mos apart. From the time we learned our second was going to be a girl, the plan was always to have them share a room. Once born, my youngest started off sleeping in a basinette in our room for the first 4-6 months, then we transitioned her into the crib in another bedroom. We did this because my thinking was I was going to be up in the night with a newborn, and I didnt want my toddler being woken by her sister, too (or vise versa). My youngest daughter was such a great sleeper that I was often up with my older girl and not her. Anyway, due to their different sleep patterns, we didnt actually put them together in the same room until my little one was about 2 1/2. She's 3 1/2 now and they sleep in the same room just fine now.

I did that with my first two because we only had 2 bedrooms. It seemed to work out ok. However, have you considered keeping your infant in your room so that he or she is easier to get to when they wake up in the night? I've done that with my little one and it's SOO much easier.

I know you mentioned the different sleep schedules in your posting, but I still wanted to share my experience. My son was 2 when my daughter was born. We also wanted them to share a room while they were little to leave our home office intact. However, they had different plans. Since they were on different sleep schedules neither one of them got enough sleep and would be cranky all day long. My son wouldn't be quiet while while the infant was still napping and the infant didn't sleep all night until she was 10 months old so everytime she woke up crying it woke up my son and then I had both children awake at 3 am. We ended up separating the children because no one was getting any sleep. Two years later, my children are still on different sleep schedules. My son is an earlier riser and goes to bed early where my daughter is a party animal and will sleep in. Their nap schedules are even different. My son naps in the late afternoon and my daughter is down for a nap around 10 am everyday. It is difficult to get anything done because they get up, eat breakfast, daughter takes a nap, eat lunch, son takes a nap, playtime for all, eat dinner and then start getting ready for bed. Our days are very scheduled.

Anyways, good luck with the room sharing. I have heard some wonderful stories about it where the children grow up loving it. In our case it just didn't work. Let me add that neither of my children like to sleep in any other locations except their beds and all doors and curtains must be closed when they go to sleep. They are the silliest kids. It is great that we don't have them wanting to sleep in our bed, but it does have its drawbacks. If one of them pees on their sheets during the night, we have to change the bedding. I have tried to tell my son to just sleep on the coach and we will do it in the morning when everyone is awake, but nope that is not good enough he only wants to sleep in his bed.

Lori,
I have a 6, 4 and a 2 year old. Up to a year ago, they all shared the same bedroom. I really think sharing a room makes kids sleep better. They have the feeling there's always someone with them at night so you can avoid a lot of the night fears they could get as they grow up. It also helps with having one schedule. I think what's key to make it work out, is to keep your newborn in your bedroom (in a crib or portable cribs) up to 2 months old. Once she is sleeping more hours at night, it will be easy to transition her to the new room. Then you can start having both of them go to bed about the same time (we always did 8 pm). Although the baby will wake up in a few hours, it will be less work for you if you get them adjusted to one bedtime and you'll get some extra time to rest before the next feeding. Overtime, the baby will start sleeping through the night and both kids will keep the same schedule! Toddlers sleep very deep at night so don't worry about night feedings or a crying baby! I know it might be a little bit hard at the beginning but on the long run it will make your life easy :)

I.

Hi Lori. My kids shared a room as well. My youngest was stayed in our room until she slept thru the night and then they shared a room. My kids have the same age difference as yours will. Since I was a full time working mom, for the most part they did have the same sleep schedule and if the baby was napping when my toddler was up, we played together in the living room so it was not a big deal. Plus they are both such sound sleepers that if one of them did wake up, the other slept right through it. I would recommend keeping the baby in your room until the appropriate time and then move them together if you think it will work for your family. Worse case scenario is that you will have to move one of them back to the spare room. Good luck!

We are in the middle of this - my son was 25 months when our baby was born. It was rough at first, but we are making progress. I t helps that our older son is such a great sleeper, and a heavy one. Nighttime actually was easier faster than naps - we often just wait until the older one is asleep before putting a drowsy baby down (baby is now 6 1/2 months). Naptime, well frankly, sometimes the baby still gets to sleep on the couch while the older one is in bed in the afternoon, but not always (this is with supervision obviously as he rolls all over the place). I think it depends so much on the older child - our older son loves that his baby brother sleeps in his room, and always asks about him when he wakes up. If you are set on this, just know that somedays are good and some are bad. Personally, I wish we were in a situation to have the choice, but we are in a 2 bedroom apartment right now - we would have waited until the baby was probably a year old to move them togther.....

I'd keep the baby in your room until she's ready for her own room and then leave her in the nursery until they are on the same sleep schedule.

No advice but I'm watching this post for guidance myself!
My son is nearly two and still sleeps with me (I'm full of excuses but mainly because hubby works third and son had breathing issues when born). We're wanting to transition him to his own room and now have another due in February. Ideally they would share a room as older brother is nine and we think it's important for him to have his own space. Two-year-old is not a good sleeper though so we know it's going to be a challenge. I'm afraid he's going to end up with me still and they baby will have its own room!