Three Random Questions... Sleep, Boob a.k.a. Security Blanket, and Baby Moves

My 27 mo. old has never slept through the night. She is a very light sleeper. My sister is like that and has been her whole life. Some people are just born that way and it is normal for them. Just give it time(hard--I know)and he will learn to go back to sleep until it is time to get up in the morning. My daughter also likes to put her hand in my shirt when she is uncomfortable. I just pull it out and kiss it then ask her if she is feeling scared, worried, uncomfortable and if she needs a hug. She usually says "yes", gets a hug and is ok. It usually depends on where the baby "implants" as to when you can "feel" them. It could be near one of you spinal nerves and you are already feeling him/her.

I can speak to #1 and #2- My first daughter woke every 2 hours for the first 2 years no matter what until the last corner of the last of the final 2 year molar came through- and then, I kid you not, she suddenly started sleeping 8 to 10 hours straight. It was amazing. i think it was around 20 or 22 months.

#2- Both my kids definitely used my boobs as their security- my 15 mo old constantly has her hand down my shirt, and she even does it absentmindedly to other people when they people hold her! My 3 year old did it for a looong time and doesn't anymore, but even now when I change my shirt, she sort of stares at my boobs lovingly. It's the funniest thing. So yes, I think it's normal and will just diminish with time.

No clue about #3- but I do think I felt my second baby earlier than the first.

#1, my daughter didn't sleep through the night consistently until she was more than one. Even now, at a little over two, she often wakes and cries out or talks to herself for a while. Our approach is to usually just ignore her, and she goes back to sleep on her own. (We can tell if it is abnormal waking, and go in - usually we just resettle her and leave quickly.) As time goes on she seems less and less disturbed by her sleep disruptions. The worst thing we tried was to actually respond to her waking, or try to get her back to sleep with our help. The more we interfere the more we keep her up.

3. I felt my baby in this pregnancy about that early. I sort of didn't believe it until my husband felt it too (maybe at 15 weeks). It seems that the baby's placement in your body can make a big difference in what you feel.

There are three things you have no control of in a child, eating, sleeping, and peeing/pooping (sigh). Your child may just be a active sleeper. You may have to just accept who he is.

The breast security thing needs to be stopped, because when baby #2 comes he is going to have big jealous issue arise if you nurse baby #2. When he reaches for you breast, give him a blanket or toy. Make a big deal about this blanket or toy. Wrap it up as a present, tell a story about it, put it in his bed when he goes to sleep, make sure he always has it with him (car, shopping, etc.) Then when he reaches for your breast, hand him the blanket or toy. Do it consistently and firmly. Name the blanket or toy. Have your husband reinforce this for you.

Yes you can probably feel the baby at 12 weeks. With the second baby you know more about your body and the things that are happening to you.

Good luck with all the changes in your life.

Hello R.,

ha, ha my daughter does the same thing! She is also two and when she gets very upset she wants to stick her hand down my shirt and squeeze my boobs. It started when I weaned a few months ago and I have heard from other moms that it is pretty common. I will just redirect her hand to touch my neck and lately she has transitioned to just wanting to put her hand in my sleeve - a lot less embarrassing. I did this like the previous poster, redirection without much ado about it, sometimes when she is very persistent, I will tell her I like it better when she puts her hand on my neck.

As far as the baby moving, my sister said the same with her subsequent pregnancies, so I think it is possible - also possible that your due sate is just a little off.

Boobie boy!!!!! OHHHHh I had/have one of those..... he is two 1/2 now... he used to be much worse... he would do it all the time... but he grew out of it... I made it so it wasn't a big deal.. and when in public.. I would remove his hand with OUT a reaction.

Your not alone!!!! :) hang in there!

What I would try for the security blanket thing is find something he likes or is more attached to than other things (blanket, stuffed animal, etc.) and keep it around close at hand when he's tired or at bed/naptime. When he goes for the boob, redirect him to the "lovey" and explain that it can "be your boob" (or however you want to explain it) when he needs that comfort. If he isn't attached to anything or there isn't a good lovey candidate around then make a big deal of buying him a new little Carters bear/dog blankey (this is what my daughter has) or stuffed animal if he has a favorite character or animal he likes. I think if you do this very consistantly he will start to transfer that comfort feeling to the lovey. Even toddlers are very attached to smells so (and this might sound weird) but maybe sleep with it a night or two, or whatever you can do to have your scent on it.

My daughter took about 2 weeks to become attached to her lovey, and now she doesn't sleep without it. I don't have any advice on getting him to sleep in his bed. My daughter took right to her big girl bed and we haven't had that problem.

I dont know what to tell you about the sleeping problem other than cutting out a nap. My daughter didnt sleep through the night until she was 2 1/2. My daughter also used my boobs as a security blanket. It didn't matter where we were anytime she was upset or bored her hands went down my shirt I think it stemed from nursing. I let her do it at home but when we were out I would remove her hand if she would stick it back in I would remove it again or pass her to her father or sit her in the cart. eventually she stopped doing that.

And as far as you feeling the baby move at 12 weeks it is very possible because you know what movement feels like you recognize it sooner. Good luck :)

Hi R.,

Is your son still nursing? Mine is (he's 2 1/2 y.o.) and we've been working toward helping him foster a relationship with his stuffed owl. It's sort of hit and miss, but the "boo-boos" are getting a bit of a break. Owl 'watches' him when I have to use the bathroom (by myself!) or when he wants to stay in one room and I want to go to another. We do some dramatic play with Owl to give him a personality of sorts, and just bring him along and encourage our son to let Owl enjoy life with him. It's helped a little...on days that he puts up a fuss for needing a few minutes of privacy, Owl is a good surrogate, but the boobs still get attention from time to time.

As for the intrauterine movement...can't help with that. Hopefully you've got a wiggly one...

Take care.

It isn't super uncommon to have boys do this sleep thing. I think it depends a lot on how dependent they are. I had one that was pretty good about sleeping through the night at that age but ironically the one that was also a boob grabber was my non-sleeper too. There is light at the end of the tunnel for these. Although, yes, every child is totally different, I found that the more we tried (thus stressing out-which kids sense) to get him to stay put and sleep through the night, the more he would end up waking up through the night. My advice is roll with the punches. In our case the boob grabbing and sleep thing cured themselves around ages 3 to 4. Above all just be consistent with your methods of redirection for the grabbing thing and soothing nighttime routine for the sleep thing. It will kick in eventually. Keeping your level of stress down at bedtime will help a ton also.

As for #3, I'm totally in agreement with the others. You can absolutely feel the baby at 12 weeks!! All my friends and doctors thought I was crazy claiming I could then, but I could feel all four of mine from around 12 weeks on. I think a part of it also depends on your own level of bodyfat internally too. The more slender you are the less there will be as a barrier between the baby's movements and your body. Enjoy! And you aren't crazy. :)

R.,

I don't have much advice for #1 and #2 except time, patience and consistency. As for #3 I say yes! definitely it's possible AND normal.

With my first I didn't feel him moving around till way later when I was already showing that I was preggo. With my second I'd feel her moving around long before I was showing. With your first pregnancy you and your body are trying to figure out what's going on. With consecutive pregnancies you and your body have a better idea what's going on, so you will feel movement a lot sooner that with the first. The caveat to that though is that if there is a 10 year gap between pregnancies it's like a first pregnancy all over again.

Good luck and hope this all helps,
Melissa