Forget About the Sleep Issues, Now I'm Angry!

Updated on October 22, 2008
S.L. asks from Hanford, CA
40 answers

I know that when people say things about your family, most people take it personal, Well every time I go the the grocery store, or good ol' Walmart, Their is always someone to comment that my baby girl is larger then other 8 month olds. Even his family say things that really make me angry, and even my boyfriends grandma says she needs those high top booties or else she will break her ankles and never walk!!!! Listen I am not a mom who believes that their can be nothing wrong with my child, I am a realistic person, and I know when a baby has weight issues and when a baby has baby rolls, My daughter is not obese, she was 7lbs 15oz, pretty much 8lbs, I was 8lbs when I was born, So my ISSUE is how can I deal with these comments, how do I not let it affect me? and I know this is only the beginning!!!!!! lol :) help!

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone, The more I thought about it the more I realized that she is an awesome baby, I don't overfeed her, and the doctor said she was in the high 70%, but that she was fine, and like you all said, when she starts walking and moving more she will lose most of it :( I am 27 years old and most of my life i have let others words effect me and slowly I am realizing that what people say should not bother me nor effect me, thanks everyone!!!!!!

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T.

answers from Las Vegas on

S.,

Can you just smile and say "she's beautiful, isn't she!" any time you get a comment. My older son has autism and we get unkind remarks frequently. You can't control how other people act, only how you do.

:-)T.

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L.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

HEALTHY babies are chubby, especially breast fed babies, that's how you know they're healthy!!! Tell them that or just ignore them.

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L.G.

answers from San Diego on

Hi S.!
First of all I'm sorry for the inappropriate comments people and especially family are making towrds your child!
Thats just straight out rude!
Hey I was almost 10 lbs when I was born and I turned out just fine! I mean you'd never really know now I'm just a shorty wih a booty but not obese!
I know its hard to deal with the comments you're receiving but think about it. An average child at 8 months has about tripled their birth weigt. So your daughter should weigh around 24lbs. If she is heavier, what the hell she is an 8 month old and just healthy. Se is too young to be worrying about her weight. If she is eating she is probably sleeping better!
To deal with what people are saying, make humor out of it! Spin it around back at them if they continue to be rude! Remember people make mean or inappropriate comments when they have insecurities of their own. Take it easy, relax, no high tops needs they might rub and irritate her skin. Just keep her active and she'll be fine!
Best wishes!

L. Garcia
____@____.com

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K.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi S....I feel your pain. People constantly tell me how big my boys are (I have twins), but you just have to do your best to ignore them. People are rude and you are never going to change that. Take pride in knowing that your little girl is well taken care of and well fed. Your pediatrician will tell you if he/she thinks your little girl is overweight. I know its hard, but just try not to let everyone hurt your feelings. I hear it only gets worse as time goes on. Oh and stay away from walmart...I HATE going there with my boys I am stared at from the second I walk in until the second I walk out and it creeps me out!

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M.

answers from Las Vegas on

At 8 months old, there is NOTHING wrong with having a chunky monkey. Chunky babies are SOOOOO cute. The first thing you need to do is get some thicker skin. People, family included, are ignorant & rude at times. Easier sid then done, I know, but you'll feel so much better if you learn to ignore most ignorant comments. I would respond to those comments by saying "I know, I just love my little butterball." or with humor "You better watch what you sy, it won't be long before she can kick your butt!" If the comments get really bothersome, you need to politely tell people that your doctor says she's perfectly healthy and your insulted that they would suggest otherwise.

Congrats on your daughter & good luck!!!

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

S.,

It's so sad and ridiculous when people can't keep there mouths shut or just mind their own business. My son was 3lbs. 4oz. 14ins. and 8 weeks early, so I knew he was going to have some catching up to do. And, I resigned myself to that fact about day two when the nurses kept telling me 'he won't always be this tiny'. But, four months into it he was still 'tiny' and people would ask me how many weeks he was and when I responded they'd look at me like we were a side show in a carnival.

Then, out of nowhere he got 'chubby' at about 7 mos and people would gawk and make comments and friends would make comments about how chunky he was...it killed me. I cried one day in front of my family when someone said something about him being 'tubby'. Especially, since some people's opinions were that it was because I was a single Mom and overcompensating for something by over feeding my son!

The only reassurance I got was from my Mom and my son's doctor. Kids as they grow go through ALL kinds of growth spurts, and my son's doc told me he was fine and that the 'chubby' cheeks and thighs would eventually be a thing of the past once he started walking and you know what they are!

It hurt to hear and see people being so insensitive and rude. But, don't worry do what you can to ignore the comments and enjoy your little one. Once, she starts moving she'll lean up and it will be a thing of the past.

My sister and I were 'chubby' babies and I see pics of me 9lbs and my sister 10lbs (almost 11 at birth) and we're both petite and fairly slender women. We get a laugh out if it here and there, but don't worry you're doing a great job and just keep loving that little one.

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J.F.

answers from San Diego on

Just one more to add... I think that most people think that chubby babies are adorable!! They may not be saying, "OH look how chubby she is," to be rude, but just for the fact that chubby babies are just about the cutest thing in the world! Everyone knows (or should know) that having a chubby baby does not by any means, mean that she is going to be a chubby child or adult. When I was a baby everyone lovingly called me chubby cheeks. Believe it or not I grew up with a complex that I was too skinny. So in other words, some people may just being rude, but I think the majority of people just can't resist an adorable chubby baby. You know your baby is healthy and that is what matters!

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

S.,

I too was a big baby (8.6) and have always been a big girl (not fat-big boned). If your daughter is big too then she's just a healthy baby. Don't let peoples opinions bother you so much. I know it's hard not to be defensive (my son is 6 and was almost 11 lbs. at birth)because its your child and thats natural for you to feel offended BUT repeat this mantra in your head; "it's not a critisism, it's just an observation." That seemed to help me with all the comments on the size of my son. Then after that comment went away as he aged (although he's very tall now, he's so much leaner then when he was a baby) the new comment I get is "wow, he has really big ears" - I feel that defensiveness come back when I hear that but repeat my mantra and it subsides.

I believe no one means to insult you. That's not their intention. That's why the mantra works for me because after I say it I then think about the person who said it to me and when I think on it long enough I know that it really wasn't their intention.

I hope it works you - I adore my son and tell him everyday how lucky I feel that I got to be his Mom. He doesn't seem to care so much about all the "wow-he's only 6" - I think he is a bit shy because of the attention though. I too got that ALL my life because I am now and always have been above average in height and weight.

Anyway, hang in there. I hope this will help a little. Either way, sounds like you're a loving, caring mother. That's what's MOST important. You're her mom and what you say really matters most to her now - not what others say.

Take care.

L.

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N.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

People are really odd and just don't get it. Sometimes myself included. I don't think the issue is the weight of look of your child but how and why it upsets You so much.

Does it make you feel like a bad mom? Do you feel your doing something wrong and it's your fault? Were you teased as a child about your weight? Do you feel bad about yourself?
You will quickly say no but really take awhile why it is quite and think about how you feel about yourself!
I think only then when you truthfully get answers of yourself will you no longer be concerned with insensitive people in the world. Lots of Love and be good to yourself.

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E.N.

answers from San Diego on

I got a lot of comments like that about my babies, too. It never bothered me (maybe because they are boys and we tend to have this mindset in our society that girls should be petite). Try to just smile and agree about how chunky and delicious she is. Chunky babies ARE delicious - boy or girl - no doubt about it! And one thing I learned to be grateful for with the chunky babies is that you have much less to worry about when they get sick. My babies always lost weight when they got sick, but I never had to worry because they had a little extra. Enjoy that cuddly baby of yours and don't let anyone deter you from believing that she is perfect, just the way she is! Not in the sense of being unrealistic, but in accepting and adoring who she is! :)

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E.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

I just wanted to mention that sometimes people comment on babies being chubby out of the sheer enjoyment of seeing a big baby!
CONFESSION: I saw the cutest chubbiest baby one day. I was with my cute chubby baby. I commented on how cute and chubby the baby was and I got a withering look from the mom. I thought my chubby baby made it obvious that I was coming from a good place, but I guess not. I truly meant no insult to the baby or her mother. There was no fixing it. I should have kept my chub-love to myself! I realize that. But also-isn't it possible that sometimes we are too sensitive and misunderstand peoples' intentions?
Of course strangers and family members alike should remember to be sensitive in commenting on babies because you just never know what the personal story is.
I just wanted to say that not all the comments come from a mean place-just an insensitive place (which doesn't make it better, perhaps just easier to know where people are coming from).
My first baby was so CHUBBY!!!! People commented all the time on it. I just said "Yeah she's a big baby". I mean she was-sheesh! No cute little onesies for her! Straight to the 6 mo clothes right off the bat.
So this is a gentle reminder to you to dismiss peoples' comments that you don't like, and a reminder to the rest of us to be more sensitive!

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A.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I know what you mean. My 3rd baby boy was 24 pounds by 4 months old! I got comments from everyone to my father in law that I should stop feeding him so much. I started to defend myself and my baby but decided it wasn't worth it. My baby was only breast fed! I did not start solid foods until like 6 months. He is now 5 years old and only 38 pounds, tall and skinny! My advise is just to blow off those people by staying away from them or kindly tell them that you attend regular doctor's appointments and my baby is in a normal size and leave it at that. If they persist just kindly ask them to not talk about it with you any more. If they can't respect that avoid them. I hope this helps. I look back on those pictures and that michelin baby rolls and think that he was so cute! and I don't think about the comments anymore!

H.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

My baby is in the 90th percentile for size for her age. I also get a lot of comments about it. Maybe your taking it personaly because deep down your afraid she may be headed for a weight problem? Perhaps I'm wrong on your reaction, but just in case, there is no relationship. Fat babies don't become fat people. I know many a slender person who had outrageous fat roles as babies. Just last night by brother- in- law made the comment that my baby looks like she's never missed any meals! I was almost offended, then realized that there is nothing wrong in being a fat baby! I'm just not going to take it as an insult because people are just observing, they don't mean anything bad. So let it go. Any ways, be thankful for your butterball of a baby, they're cuter that way!

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A.G.

answers from San Diego on

first of all, don't take the comments to heart - chubby babies usually slim down when they start moving around more - my formerly chubby little girl is now a very healthy and slim 2-1/2 year old. 8 month old babies usually do have rolls - nothing wrong with that!

If you are genuinely concerned that your angel might have a health problem, ask her pediatrician, but don't listen to the nasty folks at the store.

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T.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

If your baby is 8 months old and is almost 8 pounds that is really nothing to worry about. Baby's are suposed to have rolls. Both of my children were more than 7 pounds at birth. and were little rollie polly babies until about 2 years old. Now they are both little skinny Minnie's. Neither of them wore high top booties and neither of them broke there ankles. I haven't seen your baby but it dose not seem like she is over weight. OK, but one question has the Dr said anything about her weight? If not then don't even stress it. People are so worried about this hole childhood obesity that they forget that babies are all different and have different growth rates and that babbies are chunky! I hope that this helps.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Gosh, people can be so rude. I've learned it's just as hurtful or maybe just annoying when someone says, wow, your baby is so small. I said it the other day and could tell Daddy got offended (it's a boy thing) but I had meant - that I hadn't held a baby in so long, so compared to MY 3 and 5 year olds the baby was small.

I have two friends whose babies were breastfed only up to at least 1 yr and these babies were huge. No joke, one was 30lbs @ 6mos of age, cankles, rolls, he had it all. You should see them both now - they were just junky babies, you'd never guess that they were so big. They had no health issues, they weren't overfed, some babies are big, some are small. It's sad that many of us judge and assume things by what we see.

I say ignore it if you can. It's really none of their business. And you are right, this is only the beginning.

Best wishes,
M.

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M.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

It's great that you're on this site and these resources can be so very helpful. You are young, and you are taking in everything people say because you perhaps haven't learned quite yet that some people are just rude and insensitive and that stinks, but you've got to not let that get to you. When you let it inside, you will feel that anger and guess who will feel your anger, even if you think it's well hidden inside of you - your baby. THEN you're letting those people affect HER! Don't let that happen. Learn now, how to let rude people go on with their bitter little lives - just have fun and live your own life!
M.

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F.A.

answers from Honolulu on

A good reply to those giving you grief of your baby's size, is to say " she's healthy and that's what counts. " If that doesn't do it, be sure to have extra ammo prepared like the weight & size of your boyfriend and yourself at that age so you have comparisons to share & to also keep your anger controlled. It's really a small matter, so don't let others allow you to get to that boiling point. You'll be able to control your daughter's weight from here on, just keep in mind that you love her and she's healthy by both your standards and that of her pediatrician.
aloha

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J.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

you got to try to let it roll off your back and its hard to do. i know how you feel. my daughter is bigger then most 19 month olds. she was 8lbs 15oz (almost 9 solid pounds). babies grow very differently. my daughter will chunk up and ill notice but then she gets taller so she evens out. im sure your daughter is getting taller but she may not show huge signs of thinning out till shes walking and running. my best friend was a very chunky baby and shes so thin now so people shouldnt assume that your baby has weight issues or that you over feed her in anyway. babies know when they are hungry and full. as for the shoes ask any dr babies learn to walk best barefoot so they can see what their feet are doing. my daughter never had the hightop baby shoes and her ankels are just fine :) you have to think about the era his gma is comming from thats what they were told back then also babies were a lot weaker in that day. i like that you have a realistic approach to things it makes you less surprised or upset when things happen (im the same way). shoot my mother in law will tell me how to dress my daughter if she thinks its chilly outside and all i tell her is that if i dont need a sweater she will be fine. some people just have a problem controlling their minds so un needed comments dont come out. just try to relax i know its irritating but it will probably never stop. good luck :)

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B.N.

answers from Los Angeles on

I get the same thing with my son. He looks like he could be 18 -24 months however he is only 13 months. He is a big boy, not fat but big... well he does have little pot belly. :) It is good for kids at this age to be a little chubby (my doctor wven told me this). My son has started to shed some wieght since he is walking/running everywhere. As long as you know that your daughter is healthy, forget what other people say. Everyone has an opinion, however YOURS is the only one that counts!!! Give your daughter a big hug and be glad that she is happy & healthy.

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B.B.

answers from San Diego on

I know it is hard to not take it personally when it is regarding your child. It is your job as her mother to have that protective instinct. I too have a big 9 month old...and I deal with those comments nearly every day, but I usually come back with..."yes she IS a big girl. She is healthy. There is nothing like cuddling with baby with rolls". Seriously, it is a blessing to have a healthy child. My little one is 31 inches and 21 lbs and has a full head of hair...so she is sometimes mistaken for a 2 year old. Try to not let others comments get to you....they are just ignorant and I doubt they mean to offend you.

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M.Z.

answers from Reno on

It is really hard. People would make comments like that about my daughter, They grow out it, people are just inconsiderate. They don't think about you having heard it 10 times already today alone! It's hard to not scream at them sometimes. My stepson actually did at one point (he was 7 at the time)honestly it hadn't occured to the woman that what she was saying could be taken negatively. Once I realized that it was a little easier to "grin and bare it" Try to ignore them, most don't realize what they are doing. As for the family. Have a chat with your boyfriend and have him mention that they've informed you of their concerns enough and to take a break. May sound mean, but they probably don't realize how much it bothers you either.

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C.P.

answers from San Diego on

Hi S.,

My son was born 9lbs 2oz. He just turned 1 (has his check-up today) but I can tell you he is at least 30lbs and over 32" tall. At his 6 month check-up he was as big as his sister was at her 1 year check-up. She is 3 years old and weighs less than he does!

People are always making comments about my son and how big he is. I laugh along and don't let it burn my sleeves. I say back "yeah, more of him to love" or I'll joke back that he'll be a great hockey player when he grows up. Stuff like that. It does get to be annoying when people think they are funny by always repeatedly making stupid jokes but try not to let it get the best of you. Even though my son is still a big boy, he slimmed down a lot once he started crawling and is mobile all over the place. He is solid and very tall for a 1 year old. I miss his fat rolls!

Good luck and relax. :-)

-Char

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L.A.

answers from San Diego on

You simply need to memorize and use my favorite phrase when it comes to people who say rude, ridiculous, or idiotic things - "Thank you for bringing that to my attention." It is code for ... well, I can't really put it politely, but use your imagination regarding what you would really like to say to these people. :0) You will be amazed at how good it will feel to use this phrase on people --- because YOU know what it really means. Try it! You'll like it. There are always people in life who say stupid things. Why it upsets you so much is the thing you need to figure out. You do not want to model this over-sensitive behavior to your daughter, and certainly not the anger! I have four kids, and it took me until #1 was about 4 months old to figure out that people feel free to give all sorts of unwanted input when it comes to babies. My conclusion? Big deal! Who cares? You shouldn't. Simply say "Thank you for bringing that to my attention." It is a liberating phrase.

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J.W.

answers from Reno on

Each child has their own way of growing. I have two that have had a hard time growing at all. I have a couple that are larger than any of the other children. It is not what you do, or how you feed them that is the problem.

The problem is the way her body processes food. Tell someone that when she starts to move around the house more, ie: starting to crawl, walk, run, she will lose the chunkiness of her body. Start holding her up and walk her around the house. This will show her a newfound way of looking at things and will help her strengthen her legs for when she is ready to start walking.

Take her to the park and help her climb up on the junglegym. This is always fun for you and her. You will start to see her moving more and start to see a change in her body.

As for the people who think she is fat or bigger than the other 8 month olds.....How do they know that their father or other relative isn't a big. This is genitic also. Tell them to wait till they have children (if they don't have any).

I was at the store years ago with my 23 year old when she was just a baby. She had on a dress and had her ears pierced. There were two women in front of me that couldn't believe that I would put on a dress and pierce the ears of a "boy". I almost took off her diaper to show them she was a girl. They wouldn't believe me that she was.

People will just think what they like and not care what the parents think. Its just human nature. Don't let it bug you. When the doctors start saying there is a problem, then take care of it. Otherwise, just pull out your deaf ear and not listen. Walk away if possible.

J.

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L.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

S.,

I am going through the same thing you are. My daughter just turned 5 months old yesterday and is almost 18 lbs. People just don't think before they speak. I lost two before my daughter was born and just having her here and seeing a heathly, happy baby (no matter how much she weighs) helps me let comments roll off my back. I tell people that she is the Michelin Baby and we love every inch of her.

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A.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey S.,
Are you or your boyfriend tall? I myself am 5' 10" and when my daughter was born she weighed in at a perfect 9lbs. she was the biggest baby in the nursery that night. I have in-laws that make comments and othe people too but you know what, I know she is healthy and perfect. She still is taller than most kids her age (2yrs). I am proud of my baby girl and she is beautiful. Don't listen to what other people have to say. Your daughter is a perfect size, and she will always be. Obese is when your child is having health problems and the doctors tell you there is a problem. I think baby's with baby rolls are too cute, and with those chuncky legs, you just want to squeeze those cheeks....don't take it personel and just don't bother with what other people have to say.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

My 3 month old baby boy is 28 inches long and already 16 pounds. So as you can imagine I get a lot of comments. Every baby is different. I had 4 and they were all different. My first was "too small" my second "too fat" my third "too hyper" and now my fourth "too big".

I'm proud of all my boys and they're all o.k. As they get older their weight, hight, speech or whatever else people think is wrong levels out. My oldest is 6 and is average in height, my second is 3 and so active that I'm actually glad he was on the chubby side as a baby because he burs so many calories that I can't keep up with feeding him enough (just kidding). Number 3 is 20 month old and is a natural climber.

And my baby... I let people talk. What do they know? He's exclusively breast fed and totally healthy. We love him so much and that's all that matters.

So i guess what I'm saying is: just ignore it, brush it off and be happy to have your little angel.

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K.M.

answers from San Diego on

News flash: you will be dealing with people making stupid, yet innocent insults (and sometimes not so innocent)for the rest of your life on our planet! And, it won't just be about your gorgeous, healthy baby.

You need to decide who means enough to you to say "that hurt my feelings,or that was mean spirited, or that wasn't supportive of my child's esteem" and who to just let it slide off of your back. Master that and you will have grace and a very happy life with your precious family!!

Simple...not easy!!

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K.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

just don't take it personally - smile at what a beautiful healthy baby you have!! It is truly a joy! Unfortunately - people will always make comment on your child - even when it isn't about the weight thing... there is always something! My child was THE FATTEST petite baby ever... people always wanted to know if that was normal? Excuse me - I love my fat baby!!!! (Smile).

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L.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

People have been telling me that my son is older than he really is for most of his life. He is now 14 months old. Once he started walking, he slimmed down some, but I still get the occasional comments. So, I know what it's like to be in public and have people call your kid "chunky" "chubby" "a hunk" "stocky", etc. There really is nothing you can do except let it roll off you. As long as your doctor doesn't think there's a weight issue, there is nothing to worry about. When you are pregnant or have a young child, people think that gives them the right to say whatever they want and they don't think about the possiblity that it might hurt the mom's feelings. If your child was on the small side, you might get comments the other direction. Basically, no matter what you do, you will always get comments on your child that others do not intend to be negative, but nevertheless, come out that way. Good luck!

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C.S.

answers from San Diego on

My question is how tall are you and your boy friend? My husband is 6 foot 5 inches so when people start to make a comment I just give them family info. My oldest was only 7lb. 1oz. at birth, fell off the growth charts at about 9 months, and then at 4 years was 42lbs and 42inches the perfect size for a 5 year old going into kindergarden. She has always had a round face so people thought that she was a chuncky baby even though she was not. My son was 8lbs. 2oz. at birth and has always been in the upper % for his age. He will turn 3 on Sunday and is now 37inches and about a pound for every inch. My youngest is 6 months and she weighed 8lbs. 5oz. at birth. At her last appointment she weighed 16lbs. 5oz. and was 27inches long. She is by far the first one that I can say has looked a little chunky. But she is not fat nor are any of my other kids. What I think people need to remember is that everyone is different and that at a young age every thing is short term and transitional. What your child dose now will change tomorrow. It is important not to let your child get out of control but at the same time growth happens and it takes time for all to catch up. I hope that the next time some one says something that you inform. them that she is right on track for her age in your family. Be pround of your little one and don't let thier comments get to you. Thoughs who take the time to make a comment really have nothing better to do with their time.

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N.K.

answers from Fresno on

S.,

Well I am sure this happens to a lot people including myself. My best friend would tell me what my first daughter should, wear, eat, drink and basically do. Finally she told me one day about something she was wearing so I just told her that this is my child and though I appreciate your comments and concerns I know how to raise my child and I know what is best for her. She knew where I was coming from and decided to keep her mouth shut. Everyone I see also comments on my first daughter's weight. She is "tiny" for her age, but then again she was 9 week early. It irritates me, but I just let it go. You know you are doing the best for your child so who are they to talk about what they don't understand. I also have to hear everyone (family, friends, and even strangers) tell me that my daughters must look like their dad or that they are spitting images of their dad. That makes me so upset, but it has happened now so many times I just tell my husband and he gets this big grin and he has a better day than he already is having. I just kid with my husband, we both say that I am just the baby sitter. I just held my daughters for 9 months and went through the surgery 2 times, but whatever right? Anyway what I am trying to say is that people mean well so don't get too upset about it. You are going to do what you think is best for your child no matter what anyone says. People should think before they talk. Good luck!

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K.L.

answers from Honolulu on

You can't control other people, only yourself and your response. People can say all kinds of things, but you don't have to respond or take any of it to heart. The best way to handle it is with a sweet smile and a "thank-you" and move on.

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A.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I deal with this all the time since both of my boys are or have been on the big side. I, also, get very annoyed at all the constant comments about how big they are. As much as I get annoyed, however, I also catch myself making comments about other people's babies.

When people meet a child for the first time, they usually feel compelled to say something to acknowledge the child. Sometimes it's "what a cutie pie" or "what an adorable outfit" or "he has his mommy's eyes." But other times, the first thing that comes out is "he's a big boy!" or "she's a tiny little thing!" People are just feeling the need to say something and sometimes it's not even true - even if your child is average size you sometimes will get "what a big boy!" This is true of my older boy - he is now 50% in height, if not a little under, and he still gets comments that he is tall, usually from people who have no concept how tall a 5 year old should be. There are just a limited number of things you can say about a baby or young child when you first meet them - it's not like you can comment on their intellect or athleticism or career - so people end up saying stupid things.

So unless they're being utterly rude, e.g., suggesting your child should lose weight, chock it up to a societal thing where people feel compelled to make a comment - just let it roll off your back.

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T.N.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have a 10 month old and people either comment that she is small or large for her age?!? I think people don't remember or know how big or small kids should be (and we really shouldn't compare our babies there is only one important thing, that they are healthy) at certain ages, they just forget and think to try and be "polite" and say something complimentary about your baby. SO when people say your baby is really big just remember in your mind that people love fat babies and it is considered a sign that your baby is healthy. So smile and say thank you or say "yes we love her just the way she is"

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N.E.

answers from Honolulu on

Hi S.. I know exactly what your talking about. My daughter was 9 pounds when she was born-needless to say, she is still big. SHe is still at the 95% and 97% for height and weight and at 9 months, her doc said she was the size of a 15 month old.
We got all the comments about her size and how she is gonna be so huge when she gets older. Also that we better not feed her too much before she becomes obese. I was pissed!!! It still bothers me, but not as much as before because i know what we are doing for our child is right. No one knows your child better than its parents. My best advice-TRY not to let it get to you. Its really irritating i know, but it will never stop. At least for us it hasnt. My own father (whom i rarely see and my daughters seen maybe only 8 times) comments on her size saying she will be a football player when she gets older..UGHHHH!!!!
Enjoy your little one and screw what everyone else thinks :o) Hope this helps..

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T.H.

answers from Las Vegas on

I can understand your irritation with comments about your baby. My thought is that at 6mos she should have doubled her weight to around 16 pounds and by 12 months it should triple to around 24 pounds. These are just the AVERAGES of what All babies do. Some are bigger and some are smaller. Don't be concerned unless she is off the charts for height/weight or if her pediatrician voices concerns.
My son was just over 8 pounds when he was born and at 3 months he already weighed 16 pounds. (He has since slowed down his growth spirts that I got concerned, but he is fine.) I often get comments such as "That's what 4 months looks like??" which came from a mother of an 8 month old who was the same size as my son. Or, "Wow, he is a BIG boy." BTW, my son wears 3-6 month old clothes and is still in some of his 0-3 month old clothes as well as some 9month clothes. (Do you see my point yet?) I have NEVER heard of a baby breaking her ankles due to her weight.
Oh, something my husband told everyone when they asked what I was feeding our son that was making him grow so big...miracle grow. (That still makes me laugh.) My husband was able to find humor when I was a bit concerned. That was our only response and it has helped. Our family and friends don't comment any more about his size except to say he is going to be tall. (21 inches at birth and 26 by 3mos...)
Good luck to you,
T.

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E.N.

answers from San Diego on

Be so thankful that she is healthy! I too have a big girl (: She was 8 lbs 3oz at birth. She has been 20 lbs since she was 5 months old, in the 95%. She looked like a little sumo wrestler! She has thinned out, but she still has the rolls in the arms and legs, but you can see her neck now! Hahahaha. I used to have to clean the rolls in the back of her knees like i had to clean her neck! I love her little rolls and will be sad when they are gone.
People always comment on her size, but i do not believe it was ever in a mean way, most people love chunky babies! My daughter will be 9 months next week, i can't wait to see where her weight is at. She did slow down on weight gain, she is definetly mobile!
Maybe we can get them togahter one day so these healthy girls can play! Good job mom on taking good care of your baby! You know if she was skinny they would say you didn't feed her! Heehee. Everyone has a comment.

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M.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi S.,

I don't get it, there is nothing cuter then a little rolly polly baby with creases in their arms where there shouldn't be any! You know what and I know from experience that as the baby starts to stretch and get longer their little (or big in some eyes)tummy will start to go away and they will become thinner =( My daughter was a little rolly polly and now my grandson, and I dont understand these people who are making negative comments. I do understand you being sensitive to it and I apologize for all these rude people. Enjoy your baby and be happy that she is so healthy! take care..M.

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