Does Anyone Know How to Keep a 2Yr Old in Shopping Cart

Hi Megan,
I am a mother of 4 and step mom to 3 so once upon a time I would take 6 of them shopping with me with the two younger ones both being 2 and the next set being 4 and then 6 (not twins just good timing with his kids and mine). I leaerned with my own boys whe they were two who hated shopping and sitting in the cart, when I got to Walmart or a grocery store, i gave them each 75 cents and they held that through the store, if they were naughty i took a quarter away, they had 3 strikes. if they managed to have money left we stopped and they either rode one of the little ride on toys there or got to get something out of the machines. it worked like a charm. i now use this method with my 9 yr old still as he gets rambuctious at the store (adhd). i also used snacks. i would go in and buy a bag of grapes or a box of animal crackers and paid for them asap and the let the kdis munch while we shopped. with 7 kids in tow you had to get creative.
good luck
H.

I ended up buying one of those Toddler "leashes". It has a puppy backback and he really enjoyed wearing it. I think it's the freedom of walking along with me that he liked best. It also has a pocket so you can bring some small toys for emergancies. I still use it for busy places like airports. It's the greatest thing I ever bought for my son!! You can find them in almost any store.

The advice so far has been interesting to read. I have a 1.5 year old and a 3.5 year old and I often take them to the store with me. I try to see things from their point of view - shopping is not very exciting especially if what you really want to do is run around. I make a list and I put the little one in the cart and buckle him in and we shop as quickly as we can. The 3 year old holds onto the cart and gets to put the items in the cart IF she is doing a good job. We haven't had to leave a cart full of groceries but we have had to check out and leave a couple of times. I also try to talk with them the whole time - people around me are probably annoyed by it, but I think it helps!

We lose privaligaes (sp??) here. Yes, they know what they are even at that age. I take our 6,4,15month old everywhere and always have. They know they are not getting anything at the store (toys ect..) so there is no begging. Sure we can look but not buying. If we go to Target they know if they are good through the whole store they can choose a string cheese out of the cooler section at the end of the store(hey, I can splurge for 30cents). They do know if they act out (in the cart or anywhere at the store) that they will start losing things at home(different for all three of course) Right now it is mostly halloween candy but it may be a favorite game or PBS kids program or what ever. And we follow through with it.
Hope this helps a little bit (oh, by the way, when my oldest was two, he decided to through himself on the floor in Target, we had not even started shopping. I had my son in an infant seat. I bent over, picked up my older son, put the infant seat through my other elbow and halled him out. No way was I shopping with a child that would not get off the floor. The really wonderful thing was too there were about 15 people (felt like 100) watching me and not a single one offered to carry the infant or even get a door for me.)
Oh the joys of mother hood.
Take care,
A.

My daughter was around 2 when she started expressing her want to walk, rather than be in the cart. I'd give her the chance, and explain that if she can't be polite and stay by mom, then, she'll have to go back in the cart. Explain about getting lost and losing her in the people. (She doesn't need to know about kidnappers.) The danger of you getting lost from each other is there and she should know that. Make the trips short & during a time when you know she'll listen better. My daughter strayed a bit and most of the time she listened, but I eventually had to teach her a lesson. This sounds wierd, but I had to let her get lost. She turned the corner as she strayed away from me, and I quickly ducked into a place where I could see her but she couldn't see me. After a few "Mommy?" wimpers, I came running around the corner to her rescue. Then we had a long talk about being lost and the result of not staying with mommy. After that, the running away from me greatly reduced, or virtually disappeared. The more you trust her, the more you'll feel comfortable that she won't stray. You will never be able to trust her unless you give her the chance to earn your trust. We still talk about being lost and how scary it was for both of us. Occasionally we have to remind her of that feeling so she is less likely to do it again. She is 3 now, almost never sits in the cart, and stays by me all the time.

I also use the authority figure as a role model. I'll say, "come here right now. Here comes the manager!" Then, she'll come running. I'll even point to a complete stranger and she'll believe it and come running.

I used to have this same problem with my daughters until I realized that by going straight to the foodcourt and buying a bag of popcorn kept them occupied long enough for me to get most of what I needed if not everything. I didn't really consider it a reward but more of a bribe! Hey, it worked for me...

Good luck, from a fellow mommy who has been there!

When my daughter was that age and a complete monster in the same store Walmart. I left our cart, threw her over my shoulder and dragged her the car. I wasnot abusive but forceful, angry and she got a very harsh lecture all the way home and I reminded her how she wasnt' getting her treat anymore, mommy wasn't getting this or that and now we were gonna have to go without and I ignored her. I don't regret it at all. I was MEAN and SERIOUS and I'm a single mom so no dad to back me up or leave her with to go alone. She has never acted like that again. She's been a stinker here and there but not like that. She knew after that she had to sit in the cart, and she had to not throw a tantrum for everything she wanted.

My almost 2 year old is also starting to not stay in the cart. I put him in the actual cart and not in the seat part. I shop at Target and usually the promise of a cookie and going to the toys if he behaves works. Otherwise, as hard as it is, you have to make good on the threat of leaving the store even if it means leaving a cart full of stuff. You wouldn't be the first and won't be the last to do it.

You can also have an employee tell your child they have to stay in the cart--it's the rules. Sometimes having an "authority" figure tell them makes them stay better than mom or dad. Good luck

Well I am a mother of two a 3year old and a one year old. I take care of my husbands grandmother and take her walking three days a week so I am usually at a store each of those days unless in the summer and we just walk outside( she has to walk she had hip surgery and needs the excersize). Anyway I have been doing this since my oldest was only one. I have never bribed her to be good or to reward her with anything because she needs to learn that when you go shopping that you need to behave and stay in the cart. However starting this was very hard lesson. Because when shopping with grandparents (which she did often then) she would get something almost everytime. I had to leave Walmart and Target with her and grangdma in tow who is 90 now and leave the store with a full cart of groceries sitting in an isle. I do not like that kind of behavor and she knows that I will leave everytime this happens. I then started allowing her to bring some toy or color book with her to keep her content. I never let her in the open shopping cart for the simple fact it is just not safe. Walmart and many other locations have carts designed for multiple children to be sitting and in belts or they have carts that are made into cars or buses that keep the children safe and belted. Yes the cart is huge and bulky but the the children enjoy the ride and stay put. She soes have a little purse that she keeps her money in, it is usually money from birthdays or money that she finds in the couch or in the laundry room, this money she gets to bring with her and if she behaves she then can buy something with her money. She only has change so it is never anything big but she does enjoy a ride before leaving Walmart. If she was not good this does not happen. Stay firm with your decisions because I have never been embarrased to leave with a full cart left behind or a screaming child. Everyone has had this happened to them or to someone they know so I dont get worked up about it just adds to the situation. I would not suggest using a "leash". I think that she needs to learn how to sit in the cart and behave before being able to walk around. Even then a "leash" for me is just a horrible thought.
I also bought a LT shopping cart that she brings to the store and that lets her get involved with some of the shopping. Hope this helps good luck. A.

I have a friend going thought the same thing right now. I suggested to her that if she is just going for a few things to let him sit in the big section of the cart and it they are good they could have a little treat. I've also used the kid leash and boy did i get the looks and the comments but i figured that my kid was happy she was walking with me and i was happy knowing that she couldn't run off.

Honestly, I just don't let my daughter out of the cart. She stays buckled in the seat. If she gets out of the seatbelt, I give her a warning. If she gets out of control, we leave. It's a pain, but I don't want her to start thinking she can just run wild. Once she learns how to listen better and not try and run away whenever she's walking on her own, then I'll start letting her do that more. It's hard when they're screaming, I know. But I don't know any other way to teach her that she needs to behave or we will just remove ourselves from the situation. Good luck!

We also had a very similar experience and my husband actually came up with the solution. We put our daughter in a backpack. We especially use this when we grocery shop or else she manages to crawl all over the cart, bite through the cheese like a little mouse or throw things out of the cart...sounds like fun, huh?! The back pack for some reason seems more interesting to stay in for her and she is confined so she can't get out. The only thing (which I am waiting for to happen) is if we shop too long and she is sick of being in the backpack and decides to start taking it out on our heads! Another thing is that she does like to be in the backpack whenever we use it, so if your child already doesn't like the backpack, then this may not work. Good Luck!

I'M GIVING U THE SAME ADVICE MY MOTHER GAVE ME AND I DIDN'T BELIEVE HER UNTIL I TRIED. I HAD THE SAME PROBLEM WITH MY ALMOST 3 YEAR OLD...FIRST INCIDENT RECENTLY AT A RESTAURANT SHE SCREAMED BECAUSE HER HAIR WAS IN HER FACE AND SHE WANTED SOMEONE ELSE TO MOVE IT! THEN SHE HAS PULLED THINGS LIKE YOUR DAUGHTER HAS IN THE STORES...SHE NEVER ACTED LIKE THIS EVER!! I GOT SO FRUSTRATED AND REMEMBER CALLING MY MOM JUST HEATED/FRUSTRATED AND I STARTED CRYING BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO OR HOW TO DEAL WITH HER...SHE HAD NEVER ACTED OUT UNTIL RECENTLY. MY MOM THEN TOLD ME ALL I'D HAVE TO DO IS WHEN SHE STARTS TO ACT UP IS WHEN U IMMEDIATELY TAKE HER OUT TO THE CAR AND SIT (IF U ARE SHOPPING WITH ANOTHER LET THEM FINISH) OR LEAVE IF YOU ARE ALONE. SHE WILL LEARN THAT ALL "FUN TRIPS TO THE STORE" WILL BE CUT SHORT BY HER BEHAVIOR. I REMEMBER THINKING WELL, WHAT IF I NEED TO GO TO THE STORE WHAT A BOTHER THAT WOULD BE TO HAVE TO LEAVE BECAUSE OF HER ACTING OUT, BUT IN THE END IT WILL TEACH MY DAUGHTER A GREATER LESSON THEN IF I CONTINUED ABOUT MY SHOPPING AND LET HER ACT OUT. SHE NEEDS TO KNOW WHO'S THE PARENT AND WHO'S THE CHILD...AND THAT SHE'S NOT GETTING AWAY WITH UNACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR. DONT DO THE KID LEASH THING! SHE SHOULD UNDERSTAND HOW TO ACT EVEN IF IT RUBS INTO YOUR TIME. YOUR CHILD AND TEACHING HER CORRECTED BEHAVIOR IS BETTER THAN PUTTING HER ON A LEASH AND EXPECTING HER TO ACT RIGHT. "LEASHES" ARE A JOKE...THEY ARE FOR ANIMALS AND YOUR CHILD IS NOT AN ANIMAL!! ARE YOU GOING TO KEEP YOUR CHILD ON A LEASH UNTIL SHE'S 18 AND CAN BE ON HER OWN?? A CHILD WILL ALWAYS ACT OUT (EVEN WHEN THEY GROW UP) WHEN THEY STAND UNCORRECTED. CORRECT HER BEHAVIOR NOW AND SHE'LL HAVE BETTER ODDS SHE'LL ACT RIGHT LATER ON.

At that age, I just didn't take her shopping (and still don't sometimes). When I did, it was a nightmare. I don't have a lot of time that I can just drop my stuff and leave the store and go back some other time just to teach her a lesson, because it wasn't her choice to go to the store in the first place. Why would she care if I made her leave? That was/is my time to grab a coffee, go out and browse (or get my errands done efficiently). Now that she's three, she is much better in the stores with me. I tell her before we get there, she'll be staying in the car the entire time and she can choose if she wants to sit in the front or the back. (she usually switched mid-trip). She likes the seatbelt in the front of the cart so that keeps her restrained.
I know not everyone has the benefit of someone to watch their child so they can shop, but if you do, I recommending utilizing that.
C.

Hi megan,
my 21 month old son has a hard time with shopping also. The leash may seem barbaric to some, but it has been a life saver for my family. Now even if i am by myself or have all 4 of my kids with me, i am able to keep track of the little one. I also realized after baby number 2, that it's just easier to go shopping by myself whenever possible.

megan don't let her have the upper hand. don't let her know that it botherd you ,cause now she's embarresed you enough that she knows she can push your buttons to the point that now your afraid to take her shoping with you ,becuase of your fear that little one knows that and you can't let that get to you . Children try to see how far they can push you. simply don't let the things she does like that get to you . simply be in charge and let her know gently that you mean what you say . and don't give into her .
C. N
ps my 10 yr old daughter was and still does tatrums and stuff like that and tries to embarass me but I don't put up with it .