Burn on Hand

I agree with all the previous posts, cooking with him in front of you is way to dangerous! Put the highchair/exersaucer/jumperoo close to you so you can see him & he can see you. If possible keep it out of the kitchen. You feel bad enough over this minor accident, how bad would you feel if it was much worse. He needs to get used to it now before it becomes even more of an issue as he gets older and is able to grab at and reach things on a counter.

Good Luck! Hope his little hand is feeling better!!

Live and learn! Unfortunately, this accident will be the first of many, hopefully the rest will be less severe.

Hopefully, if your husband does have an angry reaction, it is just due to his own frustration/guilt of not being able to be there to prevent it. A quick snap reaction because of the shock of seeing your baby injured. Hopefully, he'll bounce back quickly and be supportive of you and nurturing toward your son.

My daughter is almost 5, and both I and my husband have been on "single parent" duty for lengthy periods of time due to the responsibilities of our jobs, so I understand how hard it is to get the simple day to day necessities done, like cooking, forget about the luxuries of really cleaning your house. I hope you have relatives or friends nearby that you can lean on for support!

I would just try to have several options available when cooking, bouncy seat, doorway jumper, pack and play, highchair, so you can move him from place to place if he's bored. Also, maybe he can bang on a pot with a wooden spoon - if you can stand the noise.

Stop beating yourself up (but do make sure it doesn't happen again). We're human, your son will heal, and you need to be ready to handle the next injury, which hopefully comes later not sooner.

Shame on everyone who posted just to tell you not to cook with him in a carrier. Obviously you just learned that the hard way and all mothers have learned something the hardway. I'm sure you feel bad enough without someone insulting you when you are just asking for help!
I don't know what to tell you about your husband, only you know how to handle him.
As for your son - he will heal, he won't remember it, it will be awful until it heals, but it will be fine in the end.

Lesson well learned I'd say. You will never again think that is a good idea.....right? At 8 months they are starting to test their motor skills and movement is everywhere. While you cook, try placing him in one of the following...... playpen, swing, highchair, stroller or go on babiesrus.com and look up stationery entertainers. These are awesome because it keeps baby close enough yet fully entertained. Invest in one of those and cooking time will not only be peaceful, but it will be baby/mommy time. You'll both be in the kitchen and you can talk to him and while water is boiling or pots are simmering, you can spend a few moments playing with baby. Try not to feel guilty, it happens to all of us at one point or another. And look on the bright side....when you do tell your husband, you can also have the solution already purchased and problem solved. Have fun shopping and chin up.
PS...put some AD Ointment on the babies burn.

I'm sure you feel terrible--who wouldn't? But remember, it's a lesson learned, so don't beat yourself up over it. The baby won't remember, even though you will. (My mom STILL talks about cutting my thumb while trimming my nails when I was a baby!)

It's hard to cook and watch the baby. I put my son in his exersaucer or bouncy seat in the kitchen while I'm cooking. That way, I can keep my eye on him (and sing or dance or do whatever when he fusses--and still cook!) Good luck and remember we all make mistakes!!

I'd say lesson learned and leave it at that. Your son is too active for you to do this anymore. If you MUST, then you're just going to have to take safety precautions. Face him in, stand sideways and out, and hold is arm that is facing the stove down towards your body so it doesn't fling out. Personally, I'd say that was a big, fat warning that he's just too old and active to be on you doing certain activities.

B. I'm glad he's okay. I actually sold carriers for quite some time and one of the most important things we told people is never use them while cooking or cleaning with chemicals. Now that he's getting older it will get harder to keep him still in one. My only advise is to not use the carrier while cooking any more. It's hard to get things done with babies and toddlers around but you'll figure out a way that works for you and for him. Good luck.

Hi B., first of all accidents happen but to hold your child (even in a carrying pack)while you are cooking is a very dangerous thing as you know.i am sorry that your baby got burnt and hope he will be ok. My suggestion would be to you is if you want to cook and still be close to your son, a car seat or swing or even a carrier seat is fine sit him in it next to you and not anywhere near the stove as accidents do happen. He may be fussy at first but he will get used to it.patience is a virtue. This accident was not as bad as the next one could be. I am sorry if this sounds harsh but it is better in the long run, good luck

B.,
What is it that you are looking for? The first and most important thing is that he is ok.
The second thing is never have your child on you or by the stove.
It could have been much worse.
I have known someone who had a burn so bad from coffee that they had to take skin from another part of the body to fix the burn.
If its a matter of your child crying for 45mins while you are cooking or having this happen i would choose crying!

Good Luck,

KM

Hi B., I am sorry that your baby got hurt. Your baby is better off crying in his highchair when you cook than in between you and a hot pot or hot stove.

B.,
That's why they call them accidents...don't worry about it...you didn't do anything wrong, it's hard to do more than one thing at a time sometimes....I used to cook like that too and as they get a little older, it gets harder...don't beat yourself up over it...it stinks but kids get hurt, even when we try our best to keep them safe and happy...now that he's getting bigger see if you can put him in his highchair with toys/cheerios while you cook...dinner prep time is the one time of day my little ones watch t.v....not that he's old enough but for future ref...goodluck!

Hi B.,
I also burned my son's hand in the kitchen while he was in the front carrier. I was reaching into the oven and in an instant he reached out too. We took him to the ER, and for about two weeks we had to put on prescription cream and wrap his hand in clean gauze twice a day. We put a clean baby sock over the hand to keep the bandage from unraveling, and to keep his curious fingers off, which worked very well.
Kids heal amazingly well, and soon my son's hand was healed and no more bandages. That was about 2 years ago--he's nearly 3 now, and there is no scar or even a hint of a burn. If you look at both his palms, you would never be able to tell which palm was burned.
The next two weeks will be difficult, keeping the cream on and the bandage on, but before you know it he will be just fine.
You know, it's very busy being a mom, and the only way to get things done in the kitchen is to wear the baby in the front carrier. Once he was bigger, I used to cook with mine in the backpack carrier. Think what a great cook he'll be when he grows up, from all the cooking lessons!!! :->
I know you feel badly, I know how you feel. But, as other moms have said, some sort of accident is bound to happen--kids are kids and life is messy. I can tell you are a great mom who cares deeply for her son. Just take it one day at at time, watch as his hand heals, and know that caring for his wound is one of the many amazing things you do for him as a mom.
Let me know how it goes. N.

First, don't be so h*** o* yourself. Accidents happen more often than most parents care to admit. Over the last two years we've accidently caught our little son's hand in a door jam, or the time I was fastening him into the car seat and caught his little lip in the clasp (yup -- it happens). That being said, cooking over a hot stove with your baby in a front carrier is probably not the best idea (although we've all probably done that too). As a first time mom it's hard to hear your child cry, but sometimes we let them cry when it's for their own safety (like when they get shots). Same thing applies here, it's better for your son to cry a bit in a bouncy seat far away from the stove, than be perfectly content but in danger next to you. In the meantime, you may want to make stuff that doesn't require much attention (like crockpot recipes) ... the complicated risotto might be better suited for when he's are older -- or down for a 2 hour nap (yes those days are coming too - just hang on.)

Accidents happen no matter how closely we watch our little ones. I've always said that you are a half step too far away to stop things so you watch fall after fall.

I'd say you had your scare and now it's time to take off the front pack while cooking. Put him in a high chair in the kitchen and give him some stuff to 'cook' while you are working.

Glad that he's ok!! Things do happen. When my daughter was a new born, I placed the bouncy seat on the counter as it was November and I thought the floor was too cold. I turned my back to wash dishes and BOOM, on the floor she was with the councy seat on top of her .

As moms we make mistakes thing we were doing the best thing at the time-- Dad woudl be upset, but don;t wait until he gets home. Let hm know that your son is ok, and then tell him what happend. He'll be mad just liek you feel horrible. He couldn't prevent it ( or he's asked you not to do that before?)) Either way your son is ok and lesson learned. As a mom we'll make many mistakes that our spouises woun't agree with. This is just the beginning, but a great one to learn how to work with each other as your son is ok. Glad that he is!!

I remember being terrified when my daughter fell, into the doctors we went as she wouldn't stop crying and she still had her fractured skull from birth--- its scarry but do give your son a hug and talk to his Dadddy BEFORE :) he gets home.

Firstly I'd like to say a thank you to Shannon S for her comment!

It's not easy being a mum and if we could see all the pitfalls in advance there wouldn't be any need for sites like this.

I'm sorry it happend B., I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this alone. I just wondered, the fact you were cooking holding him, is it because you can't cope with him crying if you don't? I know how hard it is being alone with a child who wants you when you need to do something else and how it can tear at you.

I just wondered if maybe you have post natal depression. Sometimes it takes something big to make you notice as it creeps up so gradually and being a first time mum too you don't know what to expect. I didn't!!

If you ever want to talk or you need to vent please, please, please don't be afraid to okay? ALL of us have made mistakes. None of us are supermum but we all do the best we can and that's what it's about.

Now enjoy your day with your little boy and make the most of every minute because you don't get them back. Time goes all too fast so don't waste it regretting things you can't change.

H.

You should never ever cook with your baby in a front pack. Count your blessings this was a minor accident, and put your son in a high chair, playpen, or something else. Even if you put him on your back, oil can still splatter and hit him in the eye. Too much of a risk!!!

I think that maybe it's not a good idea to put the baby in the front pack while cooking. Getting burned, cut, splattered happens to cooks all of the time. I am sure that you are upset about the burn. Put the baby in a bouncy seat or an exersaucer in the kitchen while you cook.

B.,

Of course your husband is going to be mad just like you would be if the shoe was on the other foot. I was shocked at the lady's post that your husband would be angry out of guilt that he wasn't there to prevent it. WHAT?? Why it is your husband's fault it happened makes no sense to me. While it was an accident, you had to know that it was dangerous cooking with an 8 month old on your front. I cook with my 8 month old all the time too but I have been wearing him in a backpack if need be for the past month or so. My son can sit up very well and I felt safer with him on my back for fear of him reaching out and grabbing something. On your front is the perfect level for the stove top. My son goes in the high chair with some Rice Krispies and some toys and then in the backpack when the high chair stops working.

Now that it has happened though, I agree with the other moms and that is to learn from the mistake and not do it anymore. There is no point in beating yourself up over it. Be thankful he wasn't burnt worse than he was and find other, safer options for while you are cooking.

I hope he heals quickly, completely and as painlessly as possible.

L.

When our middle son (now 5) was 10 months old we were on a ferry coming home from holiday at my parents house (we live in Edinburgh, Scotland and they live in the Outer Hebrides, Scotland). Anyway, he was sitting at a table with my husband and I put down a tray of tea and went off to find a high chair. Beofre my husband could stop him he had pulled the tray and the tea poured onto his chest and arm. I heard his scream, grabbed him and ran to the toilets taking his clothes off. When I got his top off the skin was peeling off his chest! I got him straight under the cold tap and the ship first aider came. We were still 2 hours away from land so the coastgaurd helicopter was called. It can't land on the ferry so my husband, older son (then 3), myself and the baby were winched off one by one and taken back onto the island to hospital as that was closer than the mainland. Here his scald was just dressed as nothing more could be done until the next day when we were flown by air ambulance to the childrens hospital in Edinburgh. A week later he had a skin graft on his chest.

Five years on all he has a slight scar on his chest but no mark on his leg where they took the skin from.

I suppose what I'm saying is yes, of course you feel awful, wretched and terribly guilty but the fact is accidents happen and there is nothing really you can do to stop them, short of wrapping your kids up in cotton wool.

You can give your baby lots of extra cuddles to make yourself feel better more than anything but just be thankfull that it wasn't worse. I know our boy could have ended up with scalding on his face or more of his body but he didn't and torturing yourself over it won't help them.

You might want to look into an Ergo carrier. He may be old enough for it now. It's a soft backpack (google it, there are lots of online sites that sell it, but you won't find it at Babies R Us). I used it from the time my daughter was about 8 or 9 months old and I still use it (she's 21 months now). She was never content in the bouncer or swing, she had to be "on" me all the time. It's definitely a safer option than the front carrier (which he will probably be outgrowing soon anyways).

We all mistakes, but the key is not to make the same ones twice. Lesson learned?! My advice for dealing with the husband when he gets home, of course just do not get defensive or make excuses. Just tell him you are sorry, you made a mistake and it will never happen again. Then tell him to call his mother and ask her about the accidents that happened to him growing up! Good luck