Bed Weting Becoming a Huge Problem!

Updated on August 26, 2008
M.R. asks from Vista, CA
61 answers

My 7 year old son still wets his bed, and I just don't know how to make him get up at night and use the bathroom, his Pediatrician suggested a bed alarm but I am not so sure about it. Has anyone heard of that and is it helpful?

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So What Happened?

Thank you everybody for are the thoughtful responses, we decided for my son that he is going to wear the Goodnight underpants, that is the only way he is comfortable right now and I would like him to be involved in solving his little problem, I also promised him a reqward, if he stops wetting his bed/pants for a certain time, so we will see if it is going to work!

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A.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughter is 7 years old & still wears goodnights to bed. The doctor said I shouldn't worry too much about it right now. I know the problem needs to be addressed but I don't want to push her into anything. My mother wet her bed when she was little until she was 11. The funny thing is is that she was potty trained before her brother who she idolizes and is a year older than her then she just went back to wetting the bed at night.

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J.T.

answers from San Diego on

Have you tried setting you own alarm and waking him up through out the night to use the bathroom--

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

My girlfriend used the bed alarm for her 7 year old son and said that it just terrified him. So, instead, she's cut down on beverages after 6pm and when she goes to bed at 10pm she wakes him and walks him to the bathroom and back to bed. Unfortunately, I think boys have a harder time with this. My stepson continued to have trouble until he was 12. Boys bodies develop differently than girls and it takes them longer to learn to wake up in the night and go to the bathroom. I suggest you try to work around it as my friend did. He will eventually grow out of it.

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K.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son (at age 8) had the same problem, slept hard didn't get up. We were given one of the wetting alarms. In the beginning I slept in his room so that I heard the alarm as well as him. It only took about a week for me to move back to my room and he then got up with the alarm. After about 5 months we started skipping nights wearing the alarm. He is now getting up on his own. As far as I am concerned for my child it worked. I have other friends who used alarms as well and it worked for them too.

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I had a boy bed-wetter until he was almost 10 years old. We tried everything and finally I made him wear pull-ups. What finally worked was my husband would wake him up a couple times a night and then again in the morning to got to the bathroom. He made it into a "guy thing" and then my son just started doing it on his own. Hope that's helpful.

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D.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dear M.,
I have 2 children, boy & girl, adults now, that were bed-wetters till they were around 11 yrs. old. It is usually inherited, we have it on both sides of the family. At first, I was annoyed with the problem, tried the rewarding system,read and watched all types of books and videos and I soon understood their problem and how it was uncontrollable for them and very frustrating for all. However, as the years went on, their bodies changed soon enough and the problem cured itself. Just encourage your child, little drinking of liquids after 8pm. Plastic sheets under the regular sheets, keep them warm, Huggies until they grow out of them at night, and lots of extra night clothes and underwear, and most of all love. Be positive with them, sleep overs are embarrassing for them. Change the bedding as soon as you can; no one likes to sleep in it! The alarm system was too expensive, I also heard it really didn't work. Some medicines work but I was told it may harm their growth. NEVER GO OVER and OVER about the situation, it just hurts them EMOTIONALLY! You have to just accept it! There is light at the end of the tunnel and let your kids know that! They are not the only ones with this problem, you just don't hear much about it outside the home.
Hopefully some of my experience will help you. Have patience and faith! It will come to an end! Keep up the smiles!

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M.M.

answers from Honolulu on

My parents had this problem with me. What they did was wake me up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom EVERY NIGHT. I don't know how long they did that but eventually I woke up myself to go. He may have a small bladder like I think I do or be really exhausted at night and not realize he is going. Be patient and calm and quiet with him when you wake him up. Give him encouragement. He may just have to get in that habit of waking up. I still wake up at least once a night to go. Hope this helps and just stick with it EVERY NIGHT. He will get it! :)

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

hi, my advice would be to get him up, not want him to get up. before you go to bed, or around midnight- get him up to go to the bathroom- see if that helps. i know when we were night training my daughter we did that for many months to get through the night. also, rule out any medical or emotional reasons as well.

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D.E.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello
I am a hypnotherapist and we work with children to help stop bed wetting. You can contact me at 818/986.2855. Thank you. Ezzy

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D.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

M., I was a bed wetter until I was 12 years old. My Mother, Grandmother, Brother, multiple Aunts and great Aunts and also my husband were bed wetters. Unfortunatly I think it's someting that has to be grown out of. It's usually because the child cannot wake up in time to go or sleeps so deeply that they cannot feel when they need to go. There are many new and improved way to help these days. I would try to Google some remmidies and maybe take your findings to his Dr. and you can work together to find something that will work for your son. Good luck!

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S.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I Emphzie with you! My name is S. M. From Riverside,CA. My son Turns 8 in two weeks! He would wet his bed every night! We would stop giving him fluids after dinner. Being positive which I found out is good and don't get upset with him. Actually in the last two weeks he has not wet the bed.... This is what my husband and I did. Evening ritual, our is bath time, story time, bathroom, prayer. We would get up with him around 2-3 am in the morning. Yes, it is hard my son is a heavy sleeper. He has a some what mature bladder.He stays dry during the day. One clue about your son's bladder. But being conststant about getting your son up. You are very tired, but you will see inprovment! When my husband get's up for work around 5:30 am we'll get him up again! P.S. go to the bathroom with him... you'll be zombie together! About the alarm a waste of money, you'll still have to get him up to take him to the bathroom. If he is a heavy sleeper they won't here it. They want mommy or daddy helping. Just be consistant it is hard but the most rewarding when your son jumps up and down because they stayed dry. Wonderful for there self confidence! One more thing if the Dr. said they will grow out of it, I've learned no they won't without your help! They also have meds but once they are off of the meds, they go right back. Take care S. M.

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L.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

My cousin occasionally wet her bed until she was a teenager and her problem was that she thought she was getting up to go to the bathroom, but she was only dreaming that she was getting up. When she was around seven she did the bed alarm which was a little device that she put in her underwear. As soon as the device would get wet the alarm would sound and she would get up to use the bathroom. She was such a heavy sleeper that she needed to use the alarm to make sure that she would not wet the bed for a couple of years. She eventually hated the alarm so much that she stopped using it, but would still have occasional accidents. That was about 20 years ago now, but the alarm did help her to realize that she was still sleeping, and only walking to the bathroom in her dream. I am not sure how the device works for boys since their "equipment" might move away from the alarm, but it is worth a try. He might just need a reminder to wake him up before he goes.

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A.R.

answers from Las Vegas on

My son is 10 years old and still wetting the bed. We tried the alarm, but it wouldn't wake him up and when I took him to the bathroom, he wouldn't even remember it in the morning because he never really woke up. Our pediatrition said that it probably wouldn't help anyway. The doctor said that they just have to outgrow it and even at age 18, 10% of kids still wet the bed. He did prescribe some medication (Tofranil) that has really helped (especially with his self-esteem). It's not a cure, but when my son takes the medication before bed, he wakes up dry. Just let your son know that it's perfectly normal and lots of other kids have the same problem (they just don't tell anyone) Good luck, but don't put too much pressure on him. You can't MAKE him get up and go to the bathroom and he probably can't make himself either.

J.E.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am a mom and practice holistic nutrition. We see a lot of these 'issues'/problems in our office. It is a kidney imbalance. As you know kids are exposed to so many 'new' things in the world/environment. Many of them are toxic and even those that are not, the body has to deal with and download any of the toxins, separate them so the body can 'eliminate' the waste. In living, especially in our current toxic world, the kidneys become overloaded, especially if there is a mineral deficiency which in today's world, is incredibly common. We usually 'treat' the kids with kidney complex by PRL and then look for other nutritional imbalances in the body and when corrected, the body heals itself and the child will wet the bed less and less and eventually not at all. Meanwhile the child will be getting much healthier at the same time. Mental clarity, energy, stronger immune system all will be improved. This could all happen and be resolved over the course of 1 to 3 months.

Namaste,

J. Eltman, MPH, RD
Preventive & Therapeutic Holistic Health

www.CreativeNutrition.com
1.877.5.EATWELL
Author: The NO DIET Diet: Healthy Meals in 5 Minutes

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C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have a nine yr old son in the same boat. My son sleeps and doesn't wake up during the night. I even tried waking him up between midnight and 1am every night. He still would wet the bed.
We have not tried the alarm. My husband says he was a bed wetter also. His family tried everything out there for him, and nothing worked. That is why we are just letting it go. If my son wets his bed during the night, he strips it when he wakes up.
My husband says he finally out did outgrow it (around 11/12 he says).
Good luck with whatever you try.

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K.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi there,
I'm sorry, I don't have advice for you but am having the same problem as you. My daughter will be 7 in June and still wets the bed every night. I'm curious to hear what advice you get if you have time to share it. Thanks!

K. F.
(____@____.com)

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K.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,

I have a psychotherapy practice and I work with kids. I find there are different reasons why kids wet the bed. I generally suggest a child try an alarm as a first step. If it's a simple problem of learning to wake themselves to go to the bathroom, many children learn quickly. Good luck, K. F.

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L.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

In the middle of the night, try carrying/walking him to the toilet so he can use the bathroom.
It works for me & my 5 year old daughter...she urinates in the toilet, while she's still asleep.

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S.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son, who will be 10 next month, had the same problem. I must say he grew out of it about 8 months ago and we haven't had an "accident" since September. He was an incredibly heavy sleeper. We did two things: no drinking liquids after 7 p.m., and then right before my husand and I want to bed (and it was usually late, about 11:30 or midnight)_we essentially sleep-walked him to the bathroom. He seemed to need to go to the bathroom around 11-midnight. Sometimes WE would actually set our alarm and walk him to the bathroom. Over time, the accidents grew fewer and farther between and finally they stopped all together. I talked to two other mom's with boys in his class and they had the same issue!

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T.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

My young cousin has this problem. His mother tried everything. He was at least 7 or 8 when they finally tried the alarm. It was amazing how well it worked. Basically there is a little sensor in their underwear and when it feels the slightest bit of moisture, it wakes them up with a little alarm. It worked really well for him. And when I say they had tried everything, I mean it. I was reading the responses and I think they litterally did all of it.

If your insurance will cover it try it. If not, try getting a kitchen timer. Set it for two hours. When it goes off tell him to get up and go and then hit a button to reset it. Maybe this will create the pattern of waking up. Basically they are too far asleep to recognize the urge to go potty.

Good Luck

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

We used one. Our son was 6 at the time. Ours was a program where the company came out and gave us a big demonstration, (lots of graphs and statistics), and explained how to use it. It cost about $1600. BUT! on the upside, it worked! My son was declared "dry" in about 3-4 months. You have to document wet spots, and times, and mail them into the company, and in return they send out encouraging letters to the child about how they are doing. About 6 months after he was declared dry, I saw one of the alarms in a JCPenney catalog (with medical stuff) for about $40. I don't know if that one comes with all the follow-up activities and the same procedures we followed with the company, but it's worth looking into.

We had to give my son a HUGE cup of water before he went to bed for 2 reasons 1) to help him feel the sensation of a full bladder and 2) when he urinated it would be diluted and not smell so strong. Then he had to sleep on this pad-like device. When he urinated on it, an alarm went off. (Yes, it was loud enough to wake everyone in the house and probably the neighbors as well). We had to get him up, make him run to the restroom and go in the toilet (which sounds odd because he just went on his bed, but there is a reason, and that is that as he gets closer to becoming "dry" he learns to stop it when the alarm goes off and will be able to go in the toilet), then we had to go back in and measure the wet spot and record it and the time on a chart to see that he was waking up to stop the flow), and HE had to change the pillow case that the alarm pad was in, wipe the moisture off it, and put a fresh pillowcase on the alarm. Then we could go back to bed. It appears he didn't go through the stages of sleep, he just fell into a deep sleep practically from the time his head hit the pillow. He was sleeping so deep that he didn't feel the sensation to go to the restroom, or he couldn't make the chemical your body needs to not let one's self urinate in one's sleep.

Not only did changing his sleep patterns help his bed wetting, but it helped extreme active state in the day. He was showing classic ADHD behaviors, but after this program he calmed down tremendously and became able to focus at school.

Hope this helps. Best of luck. It's not easy on the child who no longer wants to wear GoodNites or the parent who wants to be so supportive and patient.

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K.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

I also have a son who is 8 years old and still wets the bed. Having him wake up in the middle of the night has never worked for us. We tried the bed alarm and it worked! The alarm is attached to their underwear and sounds off at the first sign of wettness. The alarm is loud and wakes him up right away, before wetting himself. My only problem has been getting my son to continue to wear it every night. I think you have to stick with it and the outcome may surprise you. Good Luck!

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

This is not a huge problem. It is only a pain for you to have to wash the sheets. (My son has a loft bed!) Around six or seven we decided to go with Goodnights, which we called "disposable underpants" (so they weren't diapers). We also switched to morning showers, so if there was an accident he would be clean. We stopped beverages after dinner, and reiminded him to brush his teeth and pee before bed. We never really discussed it that much, it was just treated like another part of growing up. I never asked if he wet his disposables, he just put them in the trash, and on weekends would get dressed and go on with his day. We did not do sleep overs at friends, but I said it was because I was not ok with him staying with friends until he was 8, and then they would have to be earned with good behavior. He did stay with family, who were instructed to treat it as no biggee and he would know the bed time drill.
My son is now nine he occationally has an accident- especially after an extremely busy day. We stopped using disposables over the summer, and now if he has an accident(1 every 2 months), he gets up, gets changed, and sets up a sleeping bag on the floor. Then I know to clean the sheets. My peditrician and I were never to concerned as this is common for boys even until 10 or 12. It is the unspoken part of boys growing up, and I found that lots of boys in my son's grade were dealing with it, just no one talks about it. You will not be able to make your son do anything. Just be patient- this too will pass.

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R.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

yes i have a 7 year old son who still wets the bed and his peditrion just told us no drinks 2-3 hours before bed say he goes to bed at 9 so that would mean no drinks after 6pm. and try and reward him for when he is dry and another he is old enough to where you can show him how to wash his clothes and just make sure he goes to the bathroom right before he goes to bed. and they say not all those kind of stuff works all the time cause if he's a heavy sleeper then he's not going to beable to get up. so that's what i would try if i were you. cause now sfter all we done my son is dry most of the time now and i am very proud of him. if you have any questions you can e-mail me at ____@____.com thank you, R. leitzen

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J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Being a nursing student, I have no idea how open you are to this, but I've read a lot about chiropractors helping with just adjustments to the sacrum and low back. My brother had the same peoblem and was fine for about 2-3 weeks after an adjustment, and then he'd start wetting the bed again, so my parents took him in to get adjusted...and things were fine. After a while, he didn't need to get adjusted anymore for that.

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S.Z.

answers from Reno on

Some kids are not physically developed enough for nighttime dryness until they are 9 or so. (Small bladder, underdeveloped nerve senses, or several other factors can cause this.)If you know there isn't a psychological issue - a big life change, a fear of the dark, whatever - then just matter of factly put him in training pants or other underwear designed for wetting accidents at night. He'll eventually outgrow it.

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C.K.

answers from San Diego on

My mom would put my brother on the toilet every night at midnight so he could make it through the night. It took one year, but it worked.
I would do that strategy, control how much he's drinking before bedtime (it should only be water--no juice or soda) starting at 6pm, and put a diaper on him.

It will happen, be patient.

good luck

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A.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

The "Potty Pager" - vibrates and wakes up your child when any moisture starts. about $50.00 but well worth it - size of a pager (remember those?!). They got it online -

This was pediatrician recommended and after 3 nights, the daughter (of close family friends, who slept really soundly) was able to wake herself up enough to go to the bathroom.

Their experience:
first night - scared of the noise - she cried
second night - apprehension but knew what 'it' was
third night - control!
after that? "self esteem city" for a smart and funny 6 year old!
best of luck

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F.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

Yes I have experienced this bed wetting problem and what your doctor recommended, it took both of us to do it but she quit in just a few weeks. She was 11 yrs old. F.

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S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi
Iam having the same issue with my 4yo. I just bought an enuresis alarm from ebay. It makes a noise and flashes when his uderwear get wet. The theory is that the child will begin to associate the feeling of urination with waking up (about 3 weeks). The second night I added the incentive of a small reward (chocolate) if he got up to go potty, and was dry in the morning. He was dry the second night. Tonight will be the third night, so I will let you know how it goes.

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L.E.

answers from Santa Barbara on

This is not usual for boys, but you might want to check with a urologist. Additionally, limit fliud intake several hours before bedtime. And have him go to the bathroom before bed.

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A.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,
My brother wet the bed for years and years. He was such a deep sleeper that he couldn't feel the urges. My parents tried the bed alarm once with no success but the second time is what did the trick. The bed alarm is what broke him of the habit. He was about the same age as your son. I think you ought to try it! Good luck!
A.

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Contact www.handle.org The HANDLE Institute
My son wet his bed until he was 17. HANDLE method cured him in five weeks.
D. Merlin
mother/author
www.victoryoveradhd.com

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S.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi-

I just wanted to let you know that we had the same problem and you can ask the doctor to prescribe Desmopressin at age 7 for the bed wetting. He will take 1 tablet at bedtime and it helps them hold it the whole night. We only had to give it to him for 3 months and now he does not the medicine anymore and does not wet the bed at all. I hope your doctor will give this to you. Their are no side effects and your son will be very proud that he does not wet the bed anymore. Also no drinks after 7:30pm Good Luck S.

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C.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi!
As a family wellness Chiropractor, I have seen that chiropractic care can help children that have the same problem you son is facing. Check out www.icpa4kids.org and look through the research and articles on this natural method of helping his body to work better. I personally know a chirorpractor in your area named Melissa Toczak who works with children. Her name and number should be listed on the website I mentioned under "find a doctor".
Good luck!
C. Tanaka, DC
Family Wellness Chiropractor

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L.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son had the same problem until age of 8. We did not know what to do, and so I contacted a company called Pacific International. The cost was a couple hundred dollars ( this was abut 13 years ago) and it is not just a bed alarm. The condition is actually a sleep disorder.(enduritic?) They are in such a deep sleep they don't wake up. Anyway, the process is like having a newborn for a couple months but well worth it! They need to drink alot of water before bed and when he wets there is a whole process of making sure he is fuly awake and he needs to change the sheets etc.They provide all the tools you need . He did not wet the bed after that and his confidence soared. I do not think my son would have grown up to be a confident young man if we did not take care of this.

Best of luck!

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C.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi,
Well, my daughter wet the bed until she was 10 or so. Her pediatrician had also suggested the bed alarm, but my mom said absolutely not. My brothers both wet the bed until around the same age, and she had tried the bed alarm. She did not feel that it helped at all. By the time the alarm goes off they are already wet and have to get up and change, plus everyone else is awakened and everyone's sleep is disturbed. I seemed to to humiliate them more than help them. I used to take my daughter to the rr before bed, wake her up and take before I went to bed, not give anything to drink after 5:00 p.m., and still it continued. Sometimes 2 or 3 times! One of the Dr.s finally explained to me that there is a chemical when we sleep that has us stop producing urine while we sleep, and that the combination of sleeping so deeply (like the dead!) and not producing this chemical, was making her wet the bed. In 5th grade she wanted to go to a sleep-over, so I went to the Dr. and found out there is a medicine that will stop the bed-wetting. I got it for her and gave it to her a week before the sleepover, and a couple of days after. For some reason, once she took it for that week or so, she stopped wetting. I don't know if that just turned something on in her brain or what, but it sure was a blessing. I was considering keeping her on it for a year or so to see if she would outgrow it during that time, but I didn't need to. Good Luck!

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Try cutting back on when he can drink before bed. Start an hour before bed. Not working? Go back another half hour. My sons don't drink anything after 6:30 (unless dinner is really late and in that case, we'll get them up to use the bathroom before we go to bed ourselves).

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

You need to realize first off that this is NOT YOUR SON'S FAULT! He has absolutely NO control over this and probably hates it as much, if not more, than you do. Do not ever scold him, shame him or ridicule him, please!! Also, it is almost always hereditary, so that means that you or dad or one of your or his siblings was a bedwetter. If not them, then gma or gpa. They don't know 100% why some people wet the bed, but the two most popular theories are this---one is that we have a chemical in our brain that is released when we sleep that regulates the amount of urine that is produced. This is faulty in bedwetters---their brain doesn't release the chemical. Also, most bedwetters tend to be VERY deep sleepers, so they think that is also part of it. My son wet his bed off and on til he was 9. He was totally okay with it. He didn't even know it was something to be ashamed of because we never, not once, ridiculed him. (The one thing we did totally right as parents!) We explained to him what I just told you about the brain and deep sleepers, and also that his dad and uncle were bedwetters, as was his step-sister. When he got to be around 6, I taught him to put his wet stuff in the washer or the tub, put on dry pj's, put some towels over the wet spot and go back to bed! Most of the time he did!
I don't believe in withholding liquids, especially when the weather is warm, but we did try to reduce them after dinner. I never saw a correlation between liquids and peeing at night, unless he had a huge (16 oz) glass of water or something. We also made sure peeing right before bed was part of the routine. And we did encase his mattress in a waterproof pad underneath his sheet---we found an all cotton one that was way better than the vinyl. If you can't find one of those, you might consider another (Fabric) pad over the vinyl one---even with a sheet on top of the vinyl one, it is uncomfortable and made my son feel kind of clammy sometimes. The important thing to remind yourself is that he will outgrow it, I promise you. The disposable underpants----that's kind of old to have them wear them unless they're totally comfortable with it. Maybe for sleep overs? Self esteem is important, so make sure you don't do anything to damage that. My husband still has issues with how his mom handled their bedwetting as a kid! Oh! One last thing---they've also find that some bedwetting is a result of allergies, and if I remember correctly---milk was the primary offender. Try taking milk out of his diet for a month and see what happens (it takes awhile to see any results). You can substitue w/vanilla soy milk---not great, but tolerable. I know this is long, sorry, but one last thing---we used to wake him up before we went to bed and escort him to the toilet (talk about deep sleepers--he was a zombie and if we weren't careful, there'd be no aiming skill at all!!) which did cut down the number of accidents a lot. He never peed every single night, thankfully. However, my pediatrician told me that sometimes that can actually prolong the problem....but I no longer remember why. Anyway, we did stop doing that every night in hopes that it would help. I don't know whether it did or not---he was an inconsistent bedwetter. I also read that it can be helpful to ask your child to try and hold off on using the toilet for just a few minutes longer than he normally would to help train his bladder to hold it longer and get a little larger. We did that, but I never forced anything on him. Just explained that it might help if he did this, and then would ask him, "Do you think you can wait a few minutes?" and let him decide. Obviously he outgrew it and all is fine now. GOOD LUCK!

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N.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Getting your child adjusted by a chiropractor may help. A friend mentioned this to me. I guess they can increase blood flow so that your child will 'feel' it once they really need to go. hope this helps:)

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D.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughter was a bed wetter too. I tried the alarm that connects to her shirt and her undies. It was a miracle for us. It only took a short while and since using the alarm, she does not wet anymore. I have recommended this to two other parents (one with a boy and one with a girl), the were also impressed by the results. It was well worth the financial investment.
Good Luck !

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J.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would give it a shot! I learned that sometimes tend to overlook the feeling or put it off until it's too late. My daughter had similar issues and I later learned that I would have to wake her up at least once during the night & remind her to go.

It will eventually become a habit & the child will pay more attention to feeling of having to go.

Good Luck,
J

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V.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,

It may sound weird, yet hypnosis in very helpful for helping children stop wetting the bed. Please contact me if you want some information or a referral to a hypnotherapist in your area.

BTW, my daughter wet the bed until she was about 9, and the pediatrician said it was no big deal and as long as we didn't make her feel bad about it, she would outgrow it. She got really good at going into the bathroom at night and putting on Good Nights so that at sleepovers no one ever knew. She was about 9 when I became a hypnotherapist, and it was easy for her to quit after I did a couple of sessions with her.

Best of luck to you and your son,

V.

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J.D.

answers from San Diego on

Hello!
My daughter is 8 and she still wets once every 3 or 4 of weeks. We tried the alarm, and all it managed to do was give us both sleep deprivation. I changed her diet, limited liquids severly, and all of the suggestions that others gave. Nothing worked. In desperation I began waking her up every 2 or 3 hours. This was before we got the alarm. Exhausting. And it worked, she didn't wet the bed, but no sleep for us! She would pee every 2 or 3 hours, so changing the bed that often was too much for me! The alarm was the same thing, many times a night of interruption. GoodNights pull ups worked great for us, and they make them so that they aren't so noisy so it was descreet when she was a sleepovers. Eventually, she started getting up on her own. Others on the family, including myself, had a history of betwetting, we knew it was just a matter of time. The doctor said that if it was still going on by 11 or 12 years old, then she would give us pills for her, but it is fine now, and as the months go by it is longer and longer that she goes without wetting. So hang in there, and many kids to through it, so at least you know you're not alone!

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H.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi. I've got an almost 7 year old who wears a diaper EVERY night. Our pediatrician has still said, it's normal. Everything I've ever read, it's normal. It's unfortunate, but normal!!! someone on here suggested the potty pager. check it out on the web. i thought it might be an ok idea, just expensive. but truly, the best advice i've gotten is to realize he can't help it. put him in pull ups, good nights, whatever so you don't have a wet bed and child every morning and don't let him feel embarrassed. he doesn't want to do it and will stop as soon as he can. i can take my kid, walk him to the bathroom, wait for him to pee, put him back in bed and he'll never remember it in the morning. he's just not there yet. i've promised to buy him ANYTHING he wants if he stops needing diapers...nothing. he's just not there. you can try the alarm, but it sounds harsh, especially with a sibling in the house. patience is really the only thing you need - and diapers!!!
good luck. and i totally relate to the anxiety of it. i'm with you, but I'm trying very hard to accept this quirk ; )

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M.O.

answers from San Diego on

Dear M.,

Some children grow out of it. Perhaps it is time to tell your Physician that he needs to order the appropriate tests that may help to diagnose the problem. Do not accept no for an answer. The doctor is working for you after all. If your doctor is not willing to find out what is causing this problem then find one who will. Most doctors will do something more if the parent insists. In the meantime, try the alarm clock. You have nothing to lose accept a little sleep and your child may learn to get up on his own and go. Make your doctor earn his money or find one who really cares about his/her patients!

Respectfully,
Mimi

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K.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am 16 years older than my brother...we use to wake him up before we went to bed...around (9 or 10 ish) and walk him to the bathroom. We would walk him to the bathroom he would pee and then go right back to sleep....this seemed to really help him not wet the bed. Hope this helps.

K.

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B.W.

answers from Visalia on

We had this problem as well, we monitored the 3 C's before bed, citrus, carbonation, caffeine. None of these after 6:30 p.m. It seemed to help immensely. He's 8 and no longer wets the bed.

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey there, I've been through the exact same thing. Everything fine during the day, but he was such a heavy sleeper at night that nothing would wake him up. We finally found something that works. It's called the "Potty Pager" and it was our miracle. It's a small little box, just about the size of a pager. You place it between the front flaps of boys underwear. It has a small clip to hold it in place and you can even put a pull-up over everything to try and keep the bed as dry as possible during the training process. The pager has two sensors on it and when they feel moisture it causes the pager to vibrate which wakes the child. I know you're thinking "but that's after the fact", but miraculously after a while your son will start waking before he pees. It took us only about two and half weeks and our son has only had one accident since then and that was well over a year ago. You can google "Potty Pager" and read more about it. I was very scepticle, but it really does work and it's well worth it. Good luck.

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L.A.

answers from San Diego on

This is a very common thing, and should absolutely NOT be viewed as a problem. The more you make an issue of it, the worse it will be. It is usually hereditary anyway. He WILL grow out of it. I have four boys, and one was a bed wetter. We used Pull-Ups for quite a while. The alarm never worked, he slept right through it but it woke up the rest of the house. He grew out of bedwetting at around 12, and that is how it usually goes, I learned from researching the subject. They normally grow out of it between 8 and 13. The most difficult part was my son not being able to spend the night at friends houses when he was young. Do not make your son feel as if something is wrong with him, or that he is doing something wrong. He isn't. He will grow out of it. Minimize the issue as much as possible, deal with it as a fact of his current life, change the sheets when he needs them changed, and know that he is not going to be wetting the bed forever. :0)

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N.S.

answers from San Diego on

One of our friend's son's was still having problems and he was 13. There is another mom that posted about Pacific International. They used this and it was very successful. It really has been a boost to his confidence.

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L.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

We have a lot of bedwetters in my family, including me until I was 11, and now my own kids. We found out our problem was caused by allergies, especially milk and artificial colors and flavors in food. When we removed those things, my son (who had not succeeded with the bed alarm) stopped wetting. But if he gets milk, or colored candy, he still wets. Check out www.feingold.com for information about the allergies.

Whether or not you try the alarm, I do recommend you get some small waterproof pads. If your son wets, you can change just the pad (it sits on top of the sheet) and hopefully the rest of the bed stays dry.

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M.M.

answers from Honolulu on

both my boys wet the bed till eight. Dont give them anything to drink after 6 at night and get them up at least once during the night to urinate. Asthma medicines can cause this problem. If they been checked by doctor it will resove itself when you quit making an issue of it. Teach them how to care of their own bed linens but protect the mattress. Mellow out it will get over soon.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I wet the bed until I was a young adult (so did my Mom, Uncle, their parents, my brother and my sister). My Mom tried the alarm with me. I hated it, it scared me everytime it went off!

I just had to grow out of it. My Mother in Law said my husband wet the bed and she got him up twice a night for two weeks to pee and that was the end of that.

It is very common. Please know that he does not want to wet the bed anymore than you want him to, so do not punish him. I think they have pull ups for older kids who wet the bed, wish they had them when I was young!

M.

S.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

I wet the bed until I was 10. I just slept too deeply and my bladder wasn't mature enough. The bed alarm was a godsend.

I can tell you that your son already feels like a failure, no matter how kind you are, so you need to be especially careful.

Here's what my parents did that was helpful, pre- bed alarm. I was told by the doctor to hold my urine as long as possible during the day, and when I did go to start and stop. (It strengthens the muscles.) We did this for a while.

Then we got the bed alarm. (This was 30+ years ago, so they may have a better model now <grin>.) It was basically 2 sheets of heavy aluminum, the top one had small holes in it. We'd put a sheet between these two (to keep them from touching) and a sheet over the whole thing and I'd sleep on top. When the between sheet got wet, it was the same as the 2 aluminum sheets touching -- an alarm and some small lights would go off.

At first, I would sleep through it. My mom would come wake me up and help me change the sheets and get new pajamas. After a while, it would wake me up, and I could change everything myself. And finally, I would wake up BEFORE I urinated and I could get to the bathroom <grin>. When my bladder finally matured, I could hold it long enough to sleep through the night

I don't remember how long this process took, but it wouldn't surprise me if it was several months. But it really worked.

I say go for it. Seriously. It helped so very much!

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J.H.

answers from San Diego on

My grandson stopped when he hit puberty. Sadly some boys cannot control the urine. My grandson wore adult diapers by his choice vs. having to get up several times during the night. His matress had a plastic cover for protection. He also washed his sheets and blankets when needed and it was something he was proud to handle without input, concern or family upset. When he hit puberty it all stopped and he is as normal as can be! His Mom did a great job treating him with respect on how he wanted to handle it. Giving them options that they choose from gives them some control over a horrible situation!
Thanks
J.
California

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A.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.,
My son is also 7 and still wets his bed. He won't wake up even if a freight train passes by. My oldest used to wet his bed too but he grew out of it by age 8 he is now 11. I have tried everything out there as well. The best thing that works for us is just buy some goodnights and make him be responsible of the disposal of it. He eventually will grow out of it but every child is different. It doesn't hurt to try everything once.
Good luck
A.

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D.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

my son wet the bed until he was more than 8 years old because he slept so soundly. even wetting the bed and having his bed and pajamas changed did not wake him. to cope, i would get him up between 10 and 11 pm every night and walk him to the toilet and encourage him to urinate and then put him back to bed (all while he was asleep). after years of this, he started getting himself up and the bed wetting stopped. maybe it was a maturity thing. i still remember my joy the first night i heard him get up on his own.

i know this is no real solution for you; it is just my experience. i also considered the bed alarm for my son but i knew he would sleep through it. good luck with your son and know that you are not alone with your frustration.

D. s.

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A.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi M.;

I have four children and raised them while my husband supported all of us. I have my two boys had the same problem like yours, we try different things and finally we decided to put some plastic underneath the bedsheets so the their urinate will not go to the mattress and change the mattress every week/month. Then it goes away itself. Also limit their drinking of liquid until 6 or 6:30 pm and not more drink before going to bed. Always reminds them to go to the bathroom as ofter as they can. Good luck.

A.

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H.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

How does this alarm work? Some children grow out of this problem, some have underlying issues associated with this problem, some find out in their adult life that a health condition contributed to wetting the bed in the adolsences, but it could not be determined while they were children. If the alarm is going to startle a sleeping child, I don't know if that's going to help matters. They do have pull-ups for older children, it's not a cure, but at least it's available. Perhaps you can ask your child to participate in an experiment in that you could set up an alarm clock that will go off at a certain time so that he could go to the bathroom, hopefully he will understand the gesture and want to help himself in the process and it is a positive outlook....Just a thought.....GOOD LUCK!

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D.R.

answers from Reno on

My son had the same problem. He was a heavy sleeper and just couldn't seem to wake up. We just kept him in his pullup for a very long time. I tried the alarm and it did help a little but not a cure all. Most important do not make him feel bad it is not his fault!!! My doctor said he might not outgrow it till puberty when his bladder will become larger. Usually you find bed wetters in the family 2-3 in mine. So hang in there and keep a pullup on him at night. My son still stayed at friends houses he would discretely put his pullup on at night and bring it home to throw away. Kids hate it!!! Tell him it will get better and don't let anyone tease him. My son was 12 before it stopped my son is 19 now and the most amazing kid ever!! Keep having him checked for allergies or anything doctors can do these days. There is always alternative treatments acupuncture or Hylands bed wetting tablets at the health Food stores. Good Luck D.

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