5 Week Old Wont Sleep Unless I Hold Him

If you take him off, it might be mainly the heat he's used to being taken away, so maybe have someone put down a heating pad for maybe 10 minutes and then lay him in a crib/bassinet/co-sleeper. And put a piece of clothing you've worn close by so he still smells you. I've heard thats pretty successful. Also, too young to cry it out, I didn't even try until 3 months.

Or you could try Swaddling, the Miracle blanket is great.

You cannot spoil a newborn, so nurture him with all the cuddling and closeness he needs :) I wouldn't try the cry it out method just yet...and I'm really not one to ask for advice on that one as I have a 8 month old that I still can't let cry it out.

Maybe your little one needs to be inclined while sleeping. Both of my kiddos (3 and 8 months) had to sleep with the head of their mattress raised due to reflux. How does he sleep when placed in the swing or bouncy seat?

Also--are you swaddling him? This worked wonders for my kiddos. My 2nd child was very colicky and I ended up buying 'The Miracle Blanket' She went from sleeping 30 mins. to several hours without waking. We just broke her of this habit a few months ago, so it was $$$ well spent :)

Hang in there...
From one sleepy mommy to another

He is too young to let him cry it out. I think they learn to self sooth around 3 months old. I know it is hard right now, but it does only last a short time. In a couple of months you are going to wonder where that little baby is that use to sleep on your chest. I understand you need to get some rest as well at night have you tried letting him sleep in the swing. It worked wonders for us. Good luck and I hope you get some rest soon.

He is way too young to let him cry it out. They cannot self soothe until they are about 4 mo. old. My son was 5 weeks old when he was diagnosed with silent acid reflux. He did the same thing. I hardly slept because I always had to hold him. You might try letting him sleep in his car seat, bouncy chair or swing so that he is at an angle. My son slept in his car seat beside our bed until he was 4 mo. old. Does he ever arch his back and cry when taking a bottle or any other time? Just because he doesn't spit up alot doesn't mean he doesn't have reflux. Keep your head up and know that I know what you are going through. It is very hard and stressful. Hang in there. I know everything will work out. If you have anymore questions, just ask.

My first was just like that. EXACTLY! If I wanted to get any sleep at all, I had to sleep with her on my chest. And I had such guilt about it. I mentioned it to my VERY wise Daddy. He said, "Honey, with children you just do what you have to do." He excused me from the guilt and the second guessing.

It was wonderful to know that I could do whatever it took to take care of my baby girl.

I agree he is too young to cry it out just yet.
Get the majority of your rest with him on your chest and eventually wean him off.

And that part they tell you to sleep when the baby sleeps - DO IT! You have an excellent excuse...

You are going to learn as you go what is best for your son and you. Take your time. Be easy on yourself and enjoy every single second. It really does fly by...

My son is 12 weeks old today and I could have posted your post myself 7 weeks ago! The good news is that it WILL get easier. The first 6 weeks were so hard for us and even though I read everything out there and felt so prepared initially I was pretty clueless as it turned out. At night I had to have him snuggled right up in the bed next to me while my husband slept in the guestroom. I slept horribly because I was so worried about rolling over on him or something. He has been sleeping through the night since 7 weeks in his own crib, but will only nap in my arms or swing. Babies go from being "held" and rocked 24 hours a day in a warm, cozy womb to the world. So even if you are holding your baby 12 hours a day, which seems like a lot, that is still a 50% reduction. Looking at it that way made it more understandable for me. Your baby is way too little to cry it out. I know how tired you are but it really won't last forever. He needs to be comforted and reassured. This is how I survived:

- Boppy swaddler (Target or Babies R Us) at night...wheb he outgrows it get the Miracle Blanket
- Buy and read "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" and "Happiest Baby on the Block"
- When you need to do stuff around the house put him in a baby carrier that you wear. Your baby will feel your beartbeat and your warmth. I took off my shirt and just wore my bra and put his belly skin to my belly skin. That seemed very soothing for him. He would just conk out and I could get a lot of stuff done.
- Try to borrow one of those heartbeat soothers to place near your baby at nap/sleep time. It helps.

Good luck!!!!

My daughter was the same way... i bought a hammock sling and kept her in it all the time. At night we would co sleep.

i am experiencing the same w/ my nb and i thought it was "bad" of me to hold him or let him sleep in the bed (thankfully my husband is completely fine w/it). but after reading this i feel much better and i realize it's ok!

Please don't make that baby cry himself to sleep. All he wants is the closeness to his Mommy like he had in your tummy. We "teach" our babies trust by letting them know they can count on us when they need us. He has no experience in this world, and it's our job to show him love and care by tending to his needs.

Crying is the only form of communication for a baby and it's up to us to figure out what they're trying to say. At 5 weeks old, he's crying because he likes the closeness of his Mommy to make him feel safe in this big, scary world.

To give such a young baby separation anxiety would be heartbreaking. Try the "Ultimate Sleep Positioner" at Babies R Us and put him in your bed next to you. It cradles him and has a built heart beat device to put him to sleep. Sleep close enough so he can smell your scent (I know that sounds funny, but that scent is so comforting to him).

I know it's hard to go without sleep, but the safer you make him feel now, the safer he will feel in the near future without having to be "attached". Once he knows he can trust that you will be there, the anxiety slows down.

Your baby is way too young to cry it out. Remember that the world is a new and scary place to a newborn. Both of mine were that way also and I tried swaddling, but that actually made it worse for my little ones! They hated it! You sound like a great candidate for co-sleeping. My advice to you is put your baby in bed with you and get some rest yourself. They feel so safe when they know that you are right there and then as they got older I transitioned them into cribs with no problem! For us it was a win - win...I got the sleep I needed and so did my little ones. They are only this little once...before you know it they will be teenagers and we will be begging them to get out of bed at noon! Good luck!

Hi H.,
Congrats on your new one!
I too don't think that you can spoil at such an early age but I also don't think that you/him can get the much needed rest right now so early into the game.
I would suggest that you swaddle him. Both of my sons loved it and it helps them to sleep better. They really like the feeling of being in close quarters and it also helps with their arms/hands not hitting them and waking them up. I also would put him in a small bassinet or something smaller than a crib and place him in a corner instead of in the middle and use a position wedge to help keep him in a stable position.
I found a video on the web to help me learn how to swaddle properly. A special blanket is not necessary. I used a large receiving blanket. The trick to a good swaddle it to do it VERY tightly. I got alot of practice and got quite good at it after a while. You also should keep in mind what the temp will be and what kind of a blanket you'll be using. You don't want him to become over heated while swaddled. A light short sleeved onesie and and maybe light pants with some socks should do it while it's kind of cool with a receiving blanket. If it's warm I would put nothing but a diaper and some socks on. :)
Hope this helps,
C.

My kiddos are/were the same way. I swaddled both of mine, too and it really helped a lot - espceially with my second. If you need help learning how, send me a message and I will help. I really like the swaddle happy blanket sold at babies r us and Wal-Mart for $10. I can swaddle with regular baby blankets, but these work really well. FYI...read "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Harvey Karp for really good information. It's really for colicky babies, but there is really good info on how babies feel/think that makes a lot of sense.

I second the "happiest baby" book recommendation - your library might have the DVD also, which is great to watch. Babies-R-Us has swaddlers which are very easy to wrap baby in and my little guy slept in them till about 6 months when he became too big for them. The warmth and mommy smell combo are also good ideas - they CAN tell who you are by smell - pretty neat, huh!

Don't let him cry for long periods at this time - contrary to what some people say, infants DON'T manipulate with their cry - right now it's the only way he has to communicate. Think of it as if someone dropped you into a foreign country, totally different from where you've been all your life, alone, not speaking the language, and not really knowing how to use your body or interpret what's going on around you (yikes!). You'll be able to figure out what the cries mean soon if you haven't already. Untill they're closer to a 10mos-1year old, they are crying for what the NEED vs. what they WANT. My guy is 11 months old, and only in the last month or so has he started to cry when he doesn't get what he wants. Good luck!

Hi H. -
I am a first time mom too and my son is now 13 months. He did the same thing when he was about a month old too. He went through periods were he would only sleep in a bouncy seat, then only when I hold him, then only in the swing... you get the idea. The thing I learned that it usually will pass. Once we turned 2 months old, we put him in his own room and he slept just fine. No issues since.

Hi H.,

Go and get this book (or the DVD): Happiest Baby on The Block, by Harvey Karp. You can easily find it on amazon.com

It will put your mind at ease that your little one is perfectly normal, and give you ways to sooth him.

:-) H.